Me and my side of the mattress . . . .

dreamdaisy

. . . . . were, this morning, yet again as one. This has happened more than once over the past three weeks and ergo more often than I like. 'im indoors is under tremendous strain work-wise, this has been the case for the past two months and we have another two to go. He is leaving the house at any time between 5.45 and 6.30am and not returning until 7.30ish in the evening. I feed him and then he's back at work on the laptop for another couple of hours or so. It's tough.

I wake when he gets up (BP pills being noisily removed from their foil ) and then, all being well, I drop back into a doze until he comes in to say good-bye. Lately, however, once he has left I fall deeply asleep only to wake up unable to move, unable to tell where I leave off and the mattress begins.

It's not a pleasant feeling. It takes about a quarter-of-an-hour or so before I begin to feel where one ends and the other begins, and a little longer before I can move. All I can conclude is that I am waking from the deep sleep phase, the sort where your body is 'paralysed' because the brain is doing summat else (in my case usually supplying some very weirdy dreams).

I don't like it. OK, I don't like a great deal of my life with arthritis but this is a distinctly discomforting event. Hey-ho.

If you have been, thank you for reading. DD

mig

Hi DD,I wrote a long reply then deleted it as I thought that doesn't help one bit so I am sending huge but gentle hugs instead.(((((()))))) Mig

DebbieT

That sounds awful I've woken with the paralysis & that's weird enough but not a feeling like ure describing of being unable to separate where the mattress ends & you begin!!

Do you think the deeper sleep is related to worry/distress that ure hubby is working too many hours for his health? It's just I noticed you mentioned BP meds & worry can do some mighty strange things to us especially our sleep patterns.

I hope this works out for you asap DD. I hope his work tails off a bit soon so you can both relax.x

villier

DD that is awful, I had a situation years ago when I woke up early hours of the morning felt very strange and discovered all I could move was my eyes, my mum stayed with me at the time, I tried to call out for her, even my vocal chords were paralysed. To cut a long story short it turned out it was a viral infection I had, it was the most petrifying thing that has ever happened to me, so what I am trying to say is be careful in case it might be some kind of infection, it might be worth getting it checked out.................tc............Marie ((())) xx

kentishlady

Hello DD. Do hope you are feeling a little better today. I think maybe the others are right in thinking it may be caused by all the stress you have been and are under at present. Is there any possibility of you and your husband taking a short break? Am sure it would help you both if you could. Stress does extremely odd things to us which we don't always realise.

Take care. Beryl

maria09

Hi DD
Dear me what an awful experience
Sounds a good idea to go have a weekend away or even a night somewhere to forget all the stresses and strains of life
Stress can come out in many strange ways
Maria

dreamdaisy

Thank you my lovelies, this morning all was as usual viz pain, twanging and general discomfort and not the horrid 'dead weight' of limbs that don't feel like mine for some time after waking. We do need a new mattress but 'im indoors won't have it, his view being we have a bed, we have a mattress, job's a good 'un. I've given up trying to explain that mattresses need replacing every ten years or so (ours is thirteen years old) :roll:

I think the strain of life is telling on him - he woke me (and him) in the early hourse with a cross between a bark and a yell. I'm not sure who was the more unsettled. :? We would like some time away but we have two houses to sort, my Ma's probate to deal with, hospital appointments yadda yadda yadda. We'll be OK. DD

maria09

Hey DD
Just a thought when alls sorted go away for a while maybe somewhere you used to go with your parents for a trip down memory lane
Maria

stickywicket

Hm, not good at all.

I can’t really relate to the ‘melting into the mattress’ thing though, when we had a full memory foam one, as opposed to the current sprung one with the top section in memory foam, I came pretty close.

I do know that my most disturbing and vivid dreams come when I've woken up and then drifted off again so I aim to get up, or at least stay awake, once I've woken up. However, I wake up around 7am, not 5.30am.

You both sound very stressed as well you might be. However, whatever his 'bloke faults', I know Mr DD is essentially a diamond geezer who, like Mr SW before him, will, with much encouragement, be persuaded that a bed is not for life and his wife's health could be dramatically (Oh go on :!: Be dramatic ) improved with a new one. Have a relaxing weekend together lying down in a few showrooms (Take a bottle and two glasses )

BonnGayle

I get this feeling often in the winter months its dark outside Im awake but my body still thinks its asleep, on the Matress matter I rather like European beds ..you have a sprung wooden underlay like these (http://www.ikea.com/gb/en/catalog/categories/departments/bedroom/24827/) and mine you can move little sliders accross to change the support I then have a firm matress on the top its quite firm and took me some time to get used to it but now when I come back to England I have a sore back after 1 night!

Boomer13

Dear DD;

I just got a new mattress a few months ago after spending several years on a too old, to uncomfortable relic. Mr Boomer did not think we needed a new one at all. So, I was desperate (and sneaky) and bought a new one behind his back, with my own money of course, and what a difference it has made!! He hasn't admitted it yet but I notice he's not tossing around as much either. It's so comfortable after the old one

I read your experience melting into your mattress. That does sound disturbing. I haven't had anything quite like that, although when my neuropathy was about to flare I would wake in the morning and my limbs would feel like they were made of lead. I had full sensation, though.

Hope it goes away soon.
Anna

barbara12

DD that does sound very unnerving...I have been in the in between mode many a time..not knowing if you are awake or still asleep..mind you I can do that in the day... :oops: hopefully Mr DD will be able to wind down very soon and hopefully things will improve..(((()))xx

maria09

DD how about putting lumpy things in his half of the mattress
Or get a mattress topper for your half of the bed and leave him to suffer
With all our aches and pains we need a comfortable mattress
Keep at him DD wear him down
You need comfort
Maria

dreamdaisy

Oooh, sneaky Maria, that's a plan worthy of DiabolicDamsel (as Dorcas used to call me). I don't think I could bear to do that, he is working so very hard at the moment (I work hard but in a very different way) that he deserves his comfiness. Once we get ourselves sorted viz the late mums' houses and our own then I will get myself an all-singing-all-dancing electric bed. He can remain in solitary splendour in his all-sagging-all-worn-out one! DD

dachshund

Hello DD
I hope things improve for you both soon.
((((((((DD))))))))
take care
joan xx

dreamdaisy

Thank you my lovely, I am sure they will but we still have a little way to go yet. We'll get there, though, we've been through other trying times and things do improve, eventually.

I hope you and Sue are as well as you can be. DD