Feeling low, need some TLC.

DebraKelly

As you know I've not had an easy time of it over the past few months, and I am now back on Meth again.

On the good front, mobility wise I am so much better than I was 4 weeks ago and I am loving being part-time now.

On the bad front, I am not sleeping or eatting properly and in tears most of the time, was off work sick on Friday and just been pulled up for my attendance, forgetting the fact that I have got a medical condition.

Last Thursday my husband broke down in tears and said that the one thing he want more than anything was children. I just didn't know what to say to him, I was up all night crying and feeling sick (hence why I was off on Friday).

I just seem to be getting over one thing and getting hit with the next, not sure how much more I can take to be honest.

The support from my family and friends has been amazing as well as this forum, I don't know where I would be without you all.

gemmapetken

Hi
Big (soft) hugs to you!
It's hard thinking about family and having arthritis. I'm sure I read that you were put on other meds with the aim of having kids? (Sorry if I'm wrong!)
I know how you feel as I had to come off meds to have my baby. It's hard, what does your doctor say? Can you try other things whilst trying to get pregnant?
My husband wants another and I have just started cimzia and have been told do not get pregnant!!
You have yo look after yourself.
As for work make sure you document back to work interviews etc in case they become nasty!!
Keep your chin up and keep talking to hubby!!!
Big hugs!!!
Gxx

phoenixoxo

Hi Debra,

I'm sorry you've been feeling low.

It's good news that methotrexate seems to be helping your mobility, but not so good on the other fronts. Re. work, it's my experience that people vary in their attitudes to chronic illness. It's easier now that I'm self-employed, working from home and resting/sleeping whenever I feel the need, but when I worked in an office things were difficult at times. Back then, I found it helped to be very open about my arthritis, otherwise people would make assumptions and sometimes fall into a bit of a panic that translated into anger towards me. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to return to the office part time due to the side effects of my first treatment, but I'd hoped to work every other day, using my days off to recover. Is this something you could discuss with your employer?

I think Gemma's covered the family matters. From your post, I'm not sure how *you* feel about things, but perhaps once the work situation has improved it'll be a bit easier to focus on everything else. I have phases of feeling completely overwhelmed and all I can do is go through one thing at a time, step by step – or in my case, shuffle by shuffle :P

Anyway, sorry this turned into a bit of an essay! I hope you start to feel better soon

Best wishes,
Phee

cheekygirl

hi debra oh hope you start to feel bit better very soon .i am sending you lots of positive thoughs and some gentle hugs and kisses .i saw a little fairy and asked her to look after you .we are all here for you .cheeky girl xxxxx

Colin1

Hello sweetness you know sometimes us men get it all wrong it seems our mouth moves before the brain goes into gear I'm sure he regrets ever saying what he did and that he loves you very much. The road you are on is long and hard but don't forget he is making the journey with you. He will feel you pain he will sympathize he will love you and comfort you but he will never know the way in witch you are suffering. I hope things get better for you and your soon
Colin XXX

dibdab

Hi Debra,

Just sending some gentle hugs {{{{{{{{{{{{{{ }}}}}}}}}}}}} and positive thoughts. This disease is sometimes beyond the pale! :? I guess none of us can understand exactly where you are , but we do care. I know that my husband struggles to know how to support me when I am in pain, and he says it's difficult to find the right words to explain how he feels, and maybe that's where your husband is too, struggling for words. Try to keep talking, it's something that you are journeying through together.

Deb xx

Susiesoo

There is nothing I can add to what others have said, especially Colin, but I really hope you are feeling a bit brighter and more on top of things. There is no easy answer (if only) and I hope you are feeling some comfort from the TLC shown on here. Thinking of you.

Susie

bubbadog

Hi Debra, Sorry I'm coming in late on this post! Firstly let me send you a big (()). No one except us who have to deal with Arthritis know how stressful and painful it can be. I would ignore the bosses giving you a hard time about your attendance! They know your disabled and should be pleased you come into work even when your having a bad day! Your working part-time what more do they want!!
I'm pleased your mobility is better is that due to you being back on Meth or you having a good spell?
I'm afraid I agree with Colin about the male species!! I've thought about children but it wouldn't be fair to have a child when I can't do an awful lot the child would miss out and I would be constantly exhausted. Not the best environment to bring up a child! Some people can do it and I think they need a medal but I know in my case it couldn't be done. I don't know how you feel about it? I know a lot of us have spats with our OH's it's due to the stress and sometimes the other person feels useless to help you when your in pain. You just need to sit down and get it all in the open and be honest with each other. I hope you feel in a better place emotionally soon.

barbara12

Hello Debra
I see the others have given you words of comfort...I just want to send you some very gentle hugs ((((()))) xx and don't forget we are always here..