Actual Medical Chart Notes
villier
Member Posts: 4,426
1. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
3. On the second day, the knee was better, and then on the third day it disappeared.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
6. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.
7. Healthy-appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
8. The patient refused autopsy.
9. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the last three days.
12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
13. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
14. She is numb from her toes down.
15. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
16. The skin was moist and dry.
17. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
18. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
19. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
20. Rectal examination revealed a normal-size thyroid.
21. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
24. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
25. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
26. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. ____, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
27. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
28. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was hot in bed last night.
29. Patient was found in bed with her power mower
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
3. On the second day, the knee was better, and then on the third day it disappeared.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
6. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.
7. Healthy-appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
8. The patient refused autopsy.
9. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the last three days.
12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
13. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
14. She is numb from her toes down.
15. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
16. The skin was moist and dry.
17. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
18. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
19. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
20. Rectal examination revealed a normal-size thyroid.
21. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
24. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
25. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
26. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. ____, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
27. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
28. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was hot in bed last night.
29. Patient was found in bed with her power mower
Smile a while and while you smile
smile another smile and soon there
will be miles and miles of smiles
just because you smiled I wish your
day is full of Smiles
smile another smile and soon there
will be miles and miles of smiles
just because you smiled I wish your
day is full of Smiles
0
Comments
-
Thanks for the laugh Marie...brilliant.
Love
Barbara0 -
Classic, Marie. Thank you.
No 20 sounds exceptionally scary :shock:If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
Steven Wright0 -
Oh there are some gems there, thank you Villier for the much-needed giggle. DD
PS Doctors' shorthand is also good for a laugh, one of my favourites is NFN - normal for Norfolk.Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben0 -
Thanks so much!
Anna0 -
I've seen it before several times but it never fails to make me smile. Thanks for reminding me of it!
DD, my fave doctor's shorthand one is FLK - funny looking kid!0
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