Urgh, people can be so cruel.

Sezeelson

I made the mistake of mentioning I have dogs while I'm on benefits and thinks kicked off on another forum.

Apparently because I own large breed dogs (whom I have help raising) I am perfectly capable of work.

I understand benefits are not there to pay for luxuries but my dogs are more to me then that. Rossi has received training to assist me, he was a rescue dog with an aggressive pass which makes him unreliable when I fall (can't be manhandled) and untrustworthy around strangers. Because of this, we have got a another dog who is mentally sound to assist where Rossi can't. Anyone who has/knows of assistance dogs knows they must be of a certain size for them to be used to support weight safely which is why they are large. Big or small, it doesn't matter it they are well trained!? I don't smoke, drink, gamble, go clubbing, go on holiday, have the latest gadgets like some people on benefits.

I love dogs so much that I've been studying canine behaviour and have found a passion to pursue. If I'm able to, I want to become self employed in order to get off my benefits and lead a more 'socially acceptable' life.

I have been told to just get over it and that I have to just deal with it. One even said I can't be in any more pain then what they have had to work through so why do I get special treatment. Making remarks about me only being on benefits because 'they are there' and so easy to get hold off...

Anyone on ESA knows how easy it is NOT to get benefits!! They have made me feel utterly crap I don't like being on benefits as it is and I would swap my disabled life for a working life in a heart beat! I've really enjoyed working in the past and totally gutted I couldn't cope

Just needed to get this off my chest, thanks for reading!

salamander

You can spend your benefits on what you like, it's for you, and you only, to decide what is important. Disability benefits are there to help you to do things that improve your quality of life and, if owning dogs is what does that, then that is your choice. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Just because you are on benefits doesn't mean to you don't have any rights.

Sezeelson

salamander wrote:

You can spend your benefits on what you like, it's for you, and you only, to decide what is important. Disability benefits are there to help you to do things that improve your quality of life and, if owning dogs is what does that, then that is your choice. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Just because you are on benefits doesn't mean to you don't have any rights.

No your right.

It was clear they thought I shouldn't be happy as I was on benefits! They even got annoyed at me for being in education which has baffled me completely!? I couldn't attend school due to my disability so how am I supposed to get work without education??

Nothing is good enough for some.

Kittkat

Oh my god. Please do not give these ignorant people the time of day. Literally do not even read what they say if that is possible. Just because you are benefits you can't own a dog whilst every other non disabled person can? What a load of rubbish. There is lots of cruel people in the world seezelson it's not even about you they do it to everyone i bet. Don't worry about a socially acceptable life either as long as you are doing your best what more can you do? So many people get benefits in some way. Don't feel ashamed.They should be ashamed of themselves. How can any human person begrudge someone for their disability benefits or dog? Anyway please don't feel bad or take anything on board they said take care x
p.s i love dogs too but I am allergic DAMN!!!!

Toots

Oh boy, some folk :roll:

In your position, I would just 'walk away' from it, not worth your time or effort. You don't have to justify yourself.

It's entirely unfortunate that there are pre-conceptions held by many people that if you're on benefits, you're cheating the system. Especially with the likes of arthritis, where it's not easy to 'see' what may be wrong with you. The benefit cheats have certainly made life difficult for those genuinely in need, in many ways.

Pay them no heed, aside from anything else the emotional support factor of pets should not be dismissed. I am employed but not working right now and am not paid while I'm off. There's no point in me trying to claim benefits because I know full well I won't get them. I have two cats and I'd rather live on beans than give them up.

Hold your head high and ignore the nay-sayers, I wouldn't even interact with them. Hugs x

bubbadog

It shocks me how some disabled folk can turn on another disabled person especially in these times when bullying is on the increase. We need to be there for each other. And as others have said what you spend your benefits on is your business. I have to cats and the one is nearly the size of a Labrador puppy!! So does that mean I shouldn't be on benefit?

Your better off being here sezeelson, we are welcoming we don't care if you have a chimp for a pet! we support our fellow members when they need it and can have fun and a good time as well. Laughter can brighten your day!

Sezeelson

Thanks guys it hard to just ignore it sometimes, especially when it is multiple people.

I won't be going back there. There have been a few poor souls who have come on for help or advice and have been treated appallingly by certain members!? Except when their friends are in the same position it's all sympathy and blessings, such hypocrites


Oh well, at least I have the kind support of this forum were I won't be judged or pushed out just for being different.

Thanks again it means a lot to me!

Kittkat

yeah I'm pretty sure you'd have the support of everyone on this website we know how you feel!I don't think it is about you it is about them and there nastiness! Even though it is hard not to take it personally! Also I'm not even sure they'd be truly sympathetic to their friends they prob slag them off behind their backs!

Boomer13

We disabled folks tend to get isolated. Surely it makes sense for you health to retain some things that contribute to your health and well-being. Pet animals are known to improve our health and reduce stress.

I am sorry you had a negative experience regarding this. People do tend to be cruel, you are right. Sending you best wishes; you should not feel guilty about keeping your dog.

xxAnna

barbara12

You do meet all sorts..I tend to forget the awful ones and remember the good people I meet..good for you doing the dog behavior course...good luck with it all.

stickywicket

I think we, on here, owe a large debt to our Moderators who ensure that no abusive posts are permitted or, should I say, are very promptly deleted. Thanks, Mods.

phoenixoxo

Hi Sezeelson,

Yep, people can be cruel. Cruel and rubbish! I hope you're feeling a bit better now, having read all the kind words above. I've had a bit of trouble in my time, but it's helped me to realise that the types of folks who criticise are the types who are most miserable with their own lives and looking for someone else to blame. Hope that helps too

Best wishes to you and your dogs,
Phee

sailrib

Hope you are okay.

I wouldn't listen to the other people, they are not worth worrying yourself over it.

I've got a dog, a miniature dauschund and she has opened my life. I love having her around. She is a house dog as she is elderly and when we got her last year,the pervious owners had never taken her for a walk so its way too stressful to take her for a walk as she is elderly but I would never not have her, she is great.

Keep your chin up and enjoy your dogs.

Mat48

Hi - I've been recently subjected to some online bullying on another site so I know how it feels to be scrutinised and then attacked. I have deleted my account and feel confident it will be addressed by the administrators but have lost my nerve about forums now.

The reasons in my case were different to yours but the feeling it engenders is the same - isolation and lack of confidence.

My two dogs are a great source of comfort to me - mentally when they snuggle and physically because they get me out and keep me relatively fit.

When I'm flaring I find it hard to walk them and that's when I get very low. Mine are small dogs and I'm not on any benefits yet - but only because I've been lucky. I think anyone who makes judgements about others on a forum is a bully and this should not be tolerated.

When I am getting things on the NHS such a podietry or waiting in the GPs yet again - I try not to look around and make judgements about why the other patients are there. But as you rightly say of yourself you aren't a drain on the state in terms of abusing your body or gambling and it's not your fault you suffer from a chronic illness. If it takes two large dogs to keep you from harm's way and give you aid and comfort I'd say it was money well spent! Take care and try and put the resentments of others behind you please as I'm trying to just now. They must be such unhappy people to have to demean others in this way. Mat x