Update.....Onco verses Rheumy Oh and ME.

kellerman Member Posts: 741
edited 2. Jun 2014, 12:44 in Living with Arthritis archive
Well I knew it was coming. Onco insists I am getting more than enough drugs at the moment and that these drugs are prolonging life.....she's right of course. Rheumy is wanting to add to the mix with...well to be honest I don't know what but to treat the AS.
I'm afraid my thoughts are 100% with the onco.I'm not likely to change my mind so rheumy is a wee bit p******d off.Not sure if I'll have a rheumy after today.
I really could of done without this hassle. I still have an infection in my left eye although I am feeling better in myself and I'm just hoping my bloods are ok for round 2 next Wednesday.
Yesterday within the space of 3 hours most of my hair fell out...well by lunchtime I looked like a clown so today I got a wig. Now I don't know if I'm kidding myself but I think I look 10 years younger.....well I am looking at myself with one eye.
Now I am so tired so going to bed. Take care everyone Love May xx


  • Megrose489
    Megrose489 Member Posts: 745
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh May, you could do without the professionals falling out! I hope that your rheumy doesn't take it personally.

    I have two friends who both wear wigs because their hair has thinned as they've aged. They both look great, as I am sure you do, too.

    Look after yourself.

    Meg xx
  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Aww May
    Just something else!!!!!
    You're probably right about the onco and the drugs but what a decision.
    One eye or not I bet you look great in the wig....I know a few people that wear them for the same reason and they look good
    You take care
  • Numptydumpty
    Numptydumpty Member Posts: 6,415
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh May, you really don't need this! I think you have to do what you think is best, Rheumy or no Rheumy, although I'm sure he/she can't drop you for refusing drugs.
    If you think you look ten years younger and you're looking with just one eye, you probably look twenty years younger when looking with two :wink:
    In any case, I bet you rock that wig :D
    I'm pleased you're feeling better in yourself, and sincerely hope you continue to do so.
    Take care, Numpty
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    How dare your rheumatologist react in that way. :x You are facing an awful dilemma health-wise and I reckon your body is under enough of a chemical onslaught at the moment, don't you? Your rheumatologist cannot dismiss you for not doing what he/she thinks is necessary but the lack of understanding is appalling.

    I am very cross.

    Now, to more practical matters. Congratulations on buying a wig, they are an instant way to boost one's moral and self-esteem (and change one's look if you end up with a choice :wink: ) Are you a blonde, brunette or a red-head? Purple and sparkly or blue and sleek? :wink: Go on May, get a sparkly one and wear it to your next rheumatology appointment! DD

    PS ((( ))) x
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,274
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    May this is not good for you,but I am sure the onc is the best one to listen to for the min..you are such a strong brave lady...I for one am always here for you to unleash everything its good for the mind and body...(((())) xx
  • kellerman
    kellerman Member Posts: 741
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    None of this disagreement came as a surprise to me. Onco is relatatively new lovely lady, rheumy is a bit of a prig.I always knew that I'd end up on the side of the onco and be fighting her corner.I just find it ridiculous that the rheumy can't see anything but his point of view.
    Now for the wig.....well I was fair and didn't realise how grey I was until it came out. I tried quite a few and the one I got is fair with some tones in.Sensible head. Of course if we get a heatwave I'll fall back on a scarf as they are warm to wear.A wig I mean.
    I might just get a blue glittery one(or even purple) just for special occasions.
    I have heard this morning that there is to be a meeting about my care but no date has been fixed. Its a pity the rheumy has nothing better to do.I'm sure many people are waiting for appointments but he obviously likes the last word. However I will be there so as its my body I will be having the final say.I have spoken to the oncologist's secretary this

    morning and from what I can gather she is pleased I am allowed at this meeting.....think she is bullied by the rheumy.Its just his pig headed attitude.
    Thanks for your continued support and please everyone take care Love May xx
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 26,930
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    For multiple asterisks' sake! Who's body is this? Yours or the rheumatologist's? Can he see no further than the end of his own curled up, disapproving nose? (No reply needed.)

    I am on your side, May. It sounds as if the onco is too, plus the entire AC forum. It's enough. Shall we all come to the meeting? I have a wonderful image of a huge bunch of crips, with our crutches, rollators, scooters and wheelchairs holding up placards saying 'There's more to life than arthritis'.

    P.S. (((())))
  • daffy2
    daffy2 Member Posts: 1,636
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    For multiple asterisks' sake! Who's body is this? Yours or the rheumatologist's?
    I'm with Sticky on this one May. I can't help feeling part of the problem lies in the Onco being female and the Rheumy male. She can see the person at the heart of this horrid situation, he sees a condition that he can treat.She will use her knowledge experience and empathy to try and steer a way through that works for you, he sees a threat to his male urge to fix things regardless of whether it's the best thing to do. Just at the moment I can't help thinking you are better off without him and his unprofessional attitude to you and the other people involved in your care.
    My thoughts are with you, and I hope an intelligent and compassionate way forward can be found for you at the meeting.
  • Starburst
    Starburst Member Posts: 2,546
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh May! (((( )))) My initial thoughts were "don't you have enough going on without the rheum fighting his corner so vociferously?!" I agree with Stick too, it's your body and your choice. We have a saying in social work; nothing about me, without me. You are a whole individual and they all need to look at you holistically, just in terms of a condition with symptoms that need treating. I'm sorry you're having to face this battle of doctors when it's the last thing you need right now.

    Be kind to yourself and take good care x
  • villier
    villier Member Posts: 4,426
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh dear May as if you haven't enough on your plate, as you say it is your body and up to you what gets put in it. I am sure we can rustle up some supporters for that day to cheer you on.................take care.........Marie xx
  • dibdab
    dibdab Member Posts: 1,498
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh dear May, in the name of all that's reasonable......you've got enough on your plate without a pig headed prig!!!!!!!!! :x It's your body and your decision, only you know what you can and can't cope with right now, don't be pushed around please, there are other rheumys out there if needs be.

    Sorry didn't mean to rant, but bullies really annoy me.

    PLease have a bucket full of hugs ((((((((((((((((((( ))))))))))))))))).

    Deb xx
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 26,930
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello May. I'm thinking of you very much. (((())))
  • dachshund
    dachshund Member Posts: 8,350
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello May
    i will be there for you. the Onco lady seems to know you better and you are the only one who knows your body.
    good luck May take care
    thinking of you ((((((((May))))))))
    joan xx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,274
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Good for you May standing your ground...the onco sounds very nice, and I am sure you know you are in safe hands..will be thinking about you ...I have two wigs because my hair went so thin, they are very light to wear so if you need any info just pm me...good luck with the meeting...((())) xx

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