High heels and a burst of anger

Starburst

My feet and ankles are most affected by my rheumatoid and they are particularly red, angry and swollen at the moment. Another lump of bone has also appeared out of nowhere, so I'm feeling particularly delicate.

My sister announced that her legs ache from wearing high heels last night and that I have no idea how painful it is (!!) because it was like walking on tip toes and I don't walk on tip toes.

I'm afraid I got quite cross and lost my temper. I do not appreciate her comparing her choosing to wear ridiculous shoes to my life with RA.

I know I'm being over-sensitive, grumpy and pathetic but it's how I feel.

stickywicket

We do have to be aware that we don't have a monopoly on pain and that others have pains - sometimes bad ones - that we don't. However....... :roll:

In this instance I don't think you're being over-sensitive: I think she's being under-i] sensitive. i do hope you put her right.

Starburst

It wasn't her expressing pain, it was the comparison that bothered me. I don't do much 'expressing pain' myself in real life, so it is a sore point for me - no pun intended.

LignumVitae

There is one person in your life who is allowed to be super insensitive and utterly numb in the head when it comes to empathy and thoughtfulness. That person is your sibling. My brother once gave me an hour long soliloquy on how awful and terribly cruel life was since he was diagnosed with flat feet and needed orthotics to go running in or his knees would hurt after five miles. Smile, nod and just keep loving your sister.. She won't feel your anger, she's too busy worrying about the balls of her feet xx

LignumVitae

Oh and do find some bland flip flops for her next birthday/Christmas present

Slosh

Sisters can be the best and the worst. That really was incredibly insensitive of her. My sister also manages to speak without thinking so I know how you feel. One of those times of speaking without thinking and as you say she chooses to wear those shoes so any pain is self inflicted. Have you thought about tripping her up?

dreamdaisy

Of course she wouldn't think before opening her mouth, healthy people rarely do and no wonder; as a result of her choice of silly footwear she was having to deal with a brief burst of pain which is an outrage. She should be so lucky, yes? I am not surprised that you snapped back but, as Sticky says, we don't have a monopoly on pain and others cannot grasp the impact of living with it; they can't cope with limited pain for a few hours. Wimps. DD

Starburst

I do love my little sister. We fight like we did when we were kids but I wouldn't change her. I'm having my belated birthday treat this weekend from her; dinner (well, whatever I can eat with my poorly tum!) and theatre tickets. We're going to see Billy Elliot. Now, I bet his feet will hurt after all the dancing!

barbara12

LignumVitae wrote:

Oh and do find some bland flip flops for her next birthday/Christmas present

I love it....
Sorry you are suffering..but yes siblings are not the best of people to understand ..but we do so you carry on talking to us lot..xx

Slosh

Hope you enjoy your birthday treat, my daughter has seen Billy Elliot and she loved it.
I would suggest that you go via Covent Garden so your sister can try to walk over the cobbles in high heels but this probably wouldn't be much good for you either.