Some perspective.
Starburst
Member Posts: 2,546
The last few weeks have been immensely difficult for me for a whole host of reasons. Some perspective was gained yesterday in learning the news of my dear Grandma's death. She was 81 and a really rather poorly lady. Yet, she beat the odds and we all imagined that, like in previous times, she would overcome this latest hurdle.
When someone passes away, people tell you that they were a wonderful person. The same could not be said of my grandma because she exceeded 'wonderful', she was an inspiration and a much loved face within the community. She never once complained despite the last few years of her life being challenging for so many reasons. She was utterly and completely selfless. Through my dark times, she was one of the only people in the world who understood, truly empathised and did not hide away from me. She could read me like a book, knew when I was in pain and pretending I was fine. Last but not least, she was always telling me how proud she was, how far I've come and recognising my achievements. There's not another single person in the world who has managed to make me feel the same way.
I'm telling you this because, in the end, all that matters is that you were loved and she was. I feel loved too and it makes everything else feel less scary.
When someone passes away, people tell you that they were a wonderful person. The same could not be said of my grandma because she exceeded 'wonderful', she was an inspiration and a much loved face within the community. She never once complained despite the last few years of her life being challenging for so many reasons. She was utterly and completely selfless. Through my dark times, she was one of the only people in the world who understood, truly empathised and did not hide away from me. She could read me like a book, knew when I was in pain and pretending I was fine. Last but not least, she was always telling me how proud she was, how far I've come and recognising my achievements. There's not another single person in the world who has managed to make me feel the same way.
I'm telling you this because, in the end, all that matters is that you were loved and she was. I feel loved too and it makes everything else feel less scary.
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Comments
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Indeed it does.......
Despite the sad news, you mention inspiration, that is what your post is full of. That is what she saw. Grief is never easy and we cannot prepare, despite illness. Thoughts go to you.
Kirsty xx0 -
I am so sorry to read of your beloved Grandma's death, the final act of leaving is the only guarantee in life and yes, it hits those who are left very hard. It seems to me that she set you the example of how to be (no matter how tough life is) and I know you follow her example, your aspirations, ambition, achievements and attitude show that very clearly. DDHave you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben0
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What a wonderful person and what a privilege to have 'lived' with her and feel that genetic connection! Inspiration is the best form of teaching as it is the most natural form. It gives us something indelible which other forms of teaching don't.
I'm sorry she has died, Sophie. She will be a huge loss to you and to many others by the sound of it. But it seems she has taught you, and many others, the invaluable lesson that the only two things that really matter in life are to love and be loved. Perhaps that knowledge is what makes you so strong.
You will probably go through a whole host of emotions in the coming days and weeks. We will be here. ((()))If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
Steven Wright0 -
So sorry to hear that, all I can add to what has already been said is something I heard by chance on the radio shortly after my Father died, it was that no one has really died while there are people who remember them. It helped me a lot to know that while I missed him greatly, and like your Grandma he was an inspirational person, I still had all my memories of him.
Will be thinking of you over the following days ahead.He did not say you will not be storm tossed, you will not be sore distressed, you will not be work weary. He said you will not be overcome.
Julian of Norwich0 -
So sorry to hear your Grandma has passed and she was the such an inspiration to you. When someone you have been so close to passes it does leave a huge void in your life but it sounds your Grandma was so loved in the community that you will have many people to share your wonderful memories of her with. I remember when my father-in-law passed and I had a similar relationship with him that you had with your Grandma and my Dad (as I called him) was loved by the other residents' in his close. And it helped with the mourning hearing all the memories and stories they shared with us.
I totally agree with you that in the end all that matters is that your loved and your Grandma was massively loved and so are you. (())'s0 -
So sorry to hear your news. You've written a wonderful epitaph for your Grandma and I can understand how sadly she will be missed. Take good care of yourself.
Meg0 -
I am so sorry for your loss but what a lovely tribute you have written to your Nan.
I hope in time you will come to accept that although she has passed away she lived a full life and she received so much love throughout it.
You will miss her terribly but she would want you to carry on doing as well as you have been, and know she is watching over you every day.
Hips x0 -
So sorry to hear your sad news - your Grandma must have been a very special person. You will be experiencing a maelstrom of emotions right now.
Be kind to yourself.0 -
I apologise for my delay with this Sophie (((((((()))))))) I hope you are ok. Your grandmother will be so proud of you and that she has influenced and been there for you will have been as important to her as it was to you. What a fantastic lady, her kindness is still here and still alive and in you so keep her light, cherish it and let it grow for the next generation to enjoy. When I stood at my Gran's funeral and listened to person after person say how wonderful she was and how she was mother to everybody and her home was always open that was the moment that I thought it was time to forget all the what ifs and go for it with trying for children - she might never see them or they her but her spirit of mothering seems to have been with me and guided me (i've often thought what would she do or say at those critical moments). I really hope you are as OK as you can be, remember to smile and laugh as well as cry - some of the things that were her will never be lost to you.Hey little fighter, things will get brighter0
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Sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you at this sad time x0
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(((()))) Just a few more from me, Sophie.If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
Steven Wright0 -
Thank you. xx I'm sorry I haven't been back. Family engagements this week have left me quite exhausted. The funeral has been and gone, it was very sad but the turn out was incredible. People were standing and squashing, all come to pay their respects. It was very touching. There's very little that we know for certain in life except that we will die, so the legacy you leave behind is so very important.0
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