Understandably up and down still

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  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,425
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Grace,

    Thank you for letting us know how you are doing.

    Some of what you write seems very familiar to me too. My own late Mum, when we lost my Dad, spoke of the pang when she returned to the bungalow and nothing had moved.

    Packing up and disposing of clothes is such a painful thing to do and you are very wise to have kept 4 items with you.

    I am so glad you have good friends. It helps.

    The trip to see Deb will go well I am sure of it because you have approached it with you usual careful planning and will tackle it head-on.

    I wonder how is you niece? The one who was so supportive when John was in hospital? I hope you are still supporting one another.

    Much love

    Toni xxx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Grace I can only imagine how hard it is, I had to bag up my mum and dads things and that was hard enough..not to compare it to you losing your beloved John..like you say one day at a time will get you there..you seem to have good friends around you , so that is good..enjoy your break away I think its just what you need..sending you some hugs and hope they help if only a little..(())xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • GraceB
    GraceB Member Posts: 1,595
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Thank you ladies for your kind replies. Yes I need to have this next weekend away - it'll give me a break and some company. At the back of my mind though is the fact I'll come back to an empty bungalow apart from my cat Tara, who by then will probably have the hump as I'll have left her being fed by my neighbour for 2 days! Must remember to open a tin of tuna when I get back - that should win her round ...

    Toni - my niece Kate is awaiting a colonoscopy unfortunately as they are concerned about her colon. As Kate had kidney cancer 2014 and has a genetic defect (Li Fraumeni Syndrome) which makes her more at risk of cancer, we are naturally concerned about this. The only consolation is that the hospital didn't rush her straight to the scope suite and an appointment is being sent to her. Therefore we sincerely hope that this is precautionary. Kate had bilateral precautionary mastectomies - and reconstructions - in 2013 to remove the risk of her getting breast cancer. Her GP has her on a "red flag" on his system and routinely does bloods and gets checks done if there's any risk at all, even if it's a small risk.

    GraceB
    Turn a negative into a positive!
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,425
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Oh Dear Grace

    You will be very worried about your niece with her previous issues and genetic issue :?

    I very much hope all will be well for her. I'm reassured like you that the colonoscopy seems to be being treated as a routine and not urgent procedure. I will be thinking of her ((()))

    As for Tara - she will forgive you for tuna!! Cats will do anything for tuna!!

    Take care of yourself

    Love

    Toni xxx
  • GraceB
    GraceB Member Posts: 1,595
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Thanks Toni.

    The charity's van came today as arranged and John's clothes were taken. Thankfully my friend Sarah was with me at the time. I was ready for these to go - my friend Rachel helped me to bag them up Sunday - but the reality of them going was still upsetting. Had I been on my own I'd have been under the shower again - that's where I still shout, yell and scream some days.

    Tomorrow our friend Ken is here to help sort out the garage and shed for me. I suspect this'll involve his car and mine being filled and a trip to the local Council tip. I can't load or unload but the staff at the tip are very helpful and they'll unload my car.

    I've made a home made shepherd's pie ready for lunch tomorrow as a thank you for Ken (he lives alone in outer London so doesn't often get a meal cooked for him). He'll also identify tools which have a value and sell them on my behalf. He's also offered to tackle any jobs I want doing, there's two small jobs on the list so it shouldn't be too bad for him.

    I'm on leave this week from work hence being able to get these tasks done with help. I'm also about halfway packed for my weekend away as well.

    I'll let you know how tomorrow goes.

    GraceB
    Turn a negative into a positive!
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,425
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Well Grace I can see maybe why you have so many good friends around you - you are still thinking of others. I am sure Ken will enjoy a nice home-cooked meal :)

    I took a deep breath thinking of you letting John's clothes go. You did well although the shower would have been understandable in the circumstances.

    Take care now

    Love

    Toni xxx
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