I think I have finally decided after nearly 2 years to see about getting my big toes fused. My biomechanic can no longer get steroids into one of them as the bone growth is too bad. I found those injections to be so helpful. He also says that a surgeon at a nearby hospital would be very sympathetic despite some being unwilling because I am young for such an op. Also my knees are now very painful. I believe that this is because I balance on my heels and walk on the outside of my feet. So really today I am trying to get my mind clear that I am doing the right thing because I see my biomechanic again next month and while he is happy to refer me to a surgeon, he will only do so if I am clear in my mind that I will accept the offer of fusion if it is made. So my list of good and bad points are:
A good chance of being to walk pain free
Slowing down my knee degeneration which has been fast
Being able to do more as my legs and feet are so painful that they are having a serious effect on my life now.
Fewer painkillers. They can't be doing me any good.
I will lose my job as my sickness rate is appalling but it's only a matter of time before I'd have to resign anyway. This could be financially disastrous and I like my job.
Surgery making things worse but at the minute I can't see how that is possible.
Managing stairs after surgery as I live in an upstairs flat
Having to give my horse up for some time but I can't do much with him as it is.
Any other points I haven't considered would be welcome. I have been having sleepless nights pondering this