What the 'l'

daffy2
daffy2 Member Posts: 1,713
edited 25. Aug 2016, 17:14 in Community Chit-chat archive
It's only one little letter but what a difference it can make if it goes AWOL.....
The Radio Times had a bit of blurb about a new series - Rookies - part of which of which should have read '...members of the public..', except that it didn't....
In the same piece but on a different subject, not so amusing, there's the following ...'who at 19 has just left home for the first time and can barely cook for himself or use a washing machine(as his mum points out)*. WHY NOT? How does it help your child not to teach basic lifeskills for when mum isn't there to do all the boring bits? I made sure my son could cook basic meals, shop and budget for food, and wash his clothes before he went to Uni.
Sorry it's something I feel quite strongly about - learned(and sadly, frequently encouraged) helplessness in grown children is not appealing.
*my highlighting

Comments

  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,107
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Daffy I have 2 sons in there 40s and they are the cooks in there family's ..far better then I was, but I taught them from being little ..and they can iron..I have yet to teach my OH...I totally agree with you..
    Love
    Barbara
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 26,278
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    There was a more-or-less silent movie made in the late '60s by Eric Sykes called The Plank. Naturally, given the director and cast list, everything went wrong for a set of builders owing to the theft of a plank. The final scene saw the unveiling of a stone plaque which proclaimed that the building had been erected by public contributions. But, again, the 'l' was missing.

    As for the 19yr old – if I were his mother I'd be hiding in shame from the press not talking to them. I recall buying my younger son an 'easy cooking for students' book when he left for university. He was horrified that I should think so little of his culinary skills. It was he who introduced me to Delia.

    Barbara, I commiserate re Mr B. Whenever Mr SW is cooking, when we're visiting our elder son, the latter invariably takes over at some point in order to get the different components of the meal all on the table at the same time :roll:
    "The deeper sorrow carves into your being the more joy you can contain." Kahlil Gibran
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I'm surprised we don't hear more stories about starving university students as many can barely cope, even bringing home all their washing at the end of term despite having an on site launderette.

    My parents didn't expect me to do anything and I had to learn the hard way as a single Mum.On the other hand my OH was taught to do everything but chooses not to.

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,558
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh Daffy, I think this is indicative of the 'modern age' of parenting, it seems to be an era of having children but expecting others to do the parenting, starting with school. There are many tales of five year olds starting school still in nappies, unable to dress themselves, unable to use cutlery, unable to hold a conversation etc. I recall overhearing a flustered father admonishing his hysterical four-ish year old son with the words 'I can't wait for you to go to school so they can teach you manners and how to behave.' Ummmm, isn't that his and the mum's role?

    I think parents do homework for a number of reasons including it's quicker rather than arguing why it should be done, the child may not understand what has to be done, and if you do it your offspring may score better which pleases everyone.

    Mr DD lived on his own for a few years and never struggled thanks to his mum teaching him basic cooking skills etc. She was a great home cook but this is going back around forty years or so - before microwaves, ready-made meals, instant soups and noodles. My very aged Aunt still cooks five different meals when her grandchildren visit on various Saturdays - WHY? They are all in their late teens and twenties, they don't lift a finger expecting granny to do it. She is still cutting her own lawn even though she has four grandsons who don't offer. I don't understand. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • Slosh
    Slosh Member Posts: 3,194
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I am of an age when I learnt to cook at school, but made sure my daughter learnt to cook, I remember we used to play "Ready, steady cook" .Although my late Father was born in 1916, as I grew up he always used to cook the Sunday roast so that Mum had a day off (she was a very traditional housewife), and when he retired he took over cooking.
    He also taught me three important things before I left home, how to change a light bulb, how to write a cheque and how to wire a three pin plug.
    Mind you they do rather date me now!
    He did not say you will not be storm tossed, you will not be sore distressed, you will not be work weary. He said you will not be overcome.
    Julian of Norwich
  • daffy2
    daffy2 Member Posts: 1,713
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    What I find particularly strange about the helpless children syndrome is that with so many mothers working surely there should be more, not less, participation in household chores by children? How many times on TV I've heard mothers complaining about their lack of time and how much they have to do while their kids loaf around in a sea of toys and clothes with meals on demand.