Christmas Carols for Arthritics

stickywicket
stickywicket Member Posts: 27,686
edited 25. Nov 2021, 11:07 in Chit chat
If, like me, you are looking out on a dreary day and your only Christmas thoughts are of how much is still to be done, brew up a cuppa and sit down with these. They never fail to hit the spot with me. What a talented creaky bunch we are!

I'm afraid this is the best I could manage today. It is not by Cliff Richard

Christmas time.
Cocos with mulled wine.
Meth, hydroxy, penicillamine.
With trammies on standby and pred in the drawer
A time to think what are arthritic joints for?

My knee is a wreck. And so is my neck.
My fingers have gone. My feet are creaking
Dreams of surgeons. Dreams of knees
Working. Pain-free. Please, Santa, PLEASE.
If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
Steven Wright

Comments

  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh my word, what a lovely reminder of how things used to be, maybe it's time for an update? (To the tune of Silent Night and, if you are a Newbie, look away now).

    Aches and pains,
    Aches and pains,
    Everything hurts,
    Nowt has been gained
    I take the meeeds and
    Feeeel the same,
    I'm doing my best but
    Getting nowhere,
    Arthritis you have won,
    You've won
    Sadly you b*gg*r you've won.

    DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Or (guess the tune;) )

    Deck my joints with bags of hot wheat
    Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la la.
    Doesn't help but feels so jolly,
    Fa-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.
    No trace of copper, not a magnet,
    Fa-la-la, , la-la-la, la-la-la,
    Strangely there's no lasting benefit,
    Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la.


    DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • Numptydumpty
    Numptydumpty Member Posts: 6,417
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Here goes .... Walking in a Winter Wonderland

    Doctor dear, are you listening?
    It's making me sweat, my forehead's glistening
    I'm flaring again,
    I can't stand the pain
    Of walking in a winter wonderland

    Early morning went to see the toe man
    He said it was far beyond repair
    I said "are you kidding?" He said "no man"
    "Your body's bug herd but you do have quite nice hair"

    Later on, I conspired
    As I sat by the fire
    To take extra pred
    And then go to bed
    Instead of walking in a winter wonderland
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Right, this is all I can manage.

    Good King Wenceslas looked on his
    Big-gish box of med'cins.
    Then decided what to take
    and what to leave to chance-ing.

    Found he got it all so wrong
    but then he wasn't bothered
    'Cos the morphine-opoids junk
    Was so very soooo- oooth-ing.

    DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • YvonneH
    YvonneH Member Posts: 1,076

    These are from Times Past but I thought you would enjoy them.

    How about posting some yourselves?

    Yvonne x