Hi From Fee

FionaFee Member Posts: 2
edited 28. Nov 2023, 14:04 in Living with arthritis
Hello my name is Fiona

I'm 29 years old I was diagnosed with Inflammatory Arthritis and Seronegative Spondyloarthritis last year at 28 years old.

I was an active person who loved travelling, Hiking, Photography and Horse Riding. My main passions are my dogs one of whom is a working therapy dog that I was volunteering with helping children in hospitals and schools.

I was working 40hrs a week volunteering for around 4-6 hrs a week and travelling around 9 times a years

This year has been hard to say the least I think what I find hardest is not the pain or coming to terms with that i have an illness I have been battling two others since I was 17 so that did not phase me at all.

What I am struggling with the most is how disabling this is and no matter how hard I try I cant seem to find my way.

I'm used to working so hard doing a physical job now I struggle to get through the day
I'm used to hiking now I sometimes struggle to walk down my street
Walking my dogs is even a challenge

For the last year I have tried to get back to my normal self but after making my health worse trying to do so doctors and the people closest to me are all telling me to come to terms with this as this is my new life.

Having flare up after flare up, medication after medication, constant hospital visits and now the possibility of something else life at the moment is a challenge please don't think for one minute I feel sorry for my self there are a lot of people out there worse off than me but sometimes I just think when will I get a break and for once have a good day again.

Don't get me wrong I have a great support system Family, Friends, Work and Doctors but sometimes I think the only person who is really harming me is me

So my question is how do you all cope?


  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 3,635
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Fiona & a warm welcome to the Versus Arthritis forums.

    I’m so sorry to hear you have been diagnosed with spondyloarthritis and are having such a hard time at the moment.

    Finding a level of exercise and fitness that works without causing a flare in the disease, exhaustion and much too much pain is not easy. Each person is different and finding what works is a long term project. The disease is unlikely to give you a break.

    Our website has some good information on pain management and exercise that can read here:


    I’m sure you will get some good examples from our members on how they all cope.

    Best wishes
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,719
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi and welcome :)

    I guess we all have our coping strategies. Distraction is a favourite one on here. But I'm wondering if you really mean how do we cope with letting go of the things which used to give so much pleasure and now cause pain. It's hard at first but, like everything else that's worthwhile, if we persevere we get good at it.

    I have RA and OA. I started at 15 and am now 73 so I've had a fair bit of practice :wink: As the Buddists say (I think :roll: it's clinging on to thing and longing for what we can't have that makes us miserable. For me, the trick has always been to let go and find something else. If I hadn't done that I'd never have found some of the things which have given me most pleasure.

    Yours was a very full, energetic, kind and thoughtful life. It can still be all those things but maybe in different ways. Well, the 'energetic' bit should be qualified ie we spend lots of energy doing simple things :wink:

    Near the top of the Living With Arthritis forum are some 'sticky' threads ie they stay at the too because they are constantly useful. One of them either is about 'Acceptance' or contains a long thread on it. Parts of that thread are very useful to those finding acceptance difficult.

    I'm sorry, I have to go now as my sister is arriving. But do have a look. Don't cling to what people regard as 'their lives'. It won't work. Look forwards not backwards. Embrace the new. Some of it is very good indeed.
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright