Getting more depressed and frustrated

Mike1 Member Posts: 1,992
edited 2. Jun 2020, 15:08 in Coronavirus (COVID-19)

I watched the item on GMB featuring the two psychologists this morning about being isolated and the resultant risk of mental health problems and suicide. Indeed there have been a multitude of items all over TV and Radio since lockdown about how people are not managing being in lockdown. My point is HOW THE HELL DO PEOPLE THINK THAT PEOPLE LIKE ME MANAGED BEFORE LOCKDOWN. I am physically disabled, using crutches around my bungalow and a wheelchair. I live alone and have been virtually housebound since the DVLA withdrew my driving licence on medical grounds and I had to get rid of my car. I used to have a Home Help who came once a week for two hours but she is now in 12 week isolation, apart from that I used to see one of my sisters about once a week for an hour, the other one I may see once a year maybe. Other than that I had no social contact. I don't do Facebook or any other form of social media so have no contact that way either, indeed this forum is about the only way I do communicate with others (other than talking to my cat). I appreciate that there are organisations who provide phone support but I do not feel comfortable using them as it means talking to strangers and I have had to rely on myself for the past 20 years, I suppose it is also my ex-forces mentality.

All these videos of how people are not managing in isolation is really doing my head in and I am becoming more and more depressed as the vast majority of the moaners are not in solo isolation as they have their partners and/or family around them to support them. Prior to the lockdown I could more or less manage being alone, albeit I admit that I have my dark days, but now I range from depression to being really wound up by the moaners.

My hope is that once the restrictions have been lifted the public remember how they felt and there is greater consideration for those of us who live alone and are virtually housebound.



  • Gemthom85
    Gemthom85 Member Posts: 26
    It is hard. Im in the same boat with isolation. Iv stopped watching tv or listening to the radio. It cant upset you if you dont hear it. 💁‍♀️ stay positive! An do things you enjoy!
  • Eir1971
    Eir1971 Member Posts: 20

    I think it's natural for people who live normal lives to struggle in isolation, I don't think having someone to isolate with means it is easier for them or that they have any more support. A lot of households are feeling the strain from being together for virtually 24 hours a day, the rise in domestic violence reflects this.

    If it's making you depressed maybe you should stop watching these programmes, concentrate on yourself and improving your own wellbeing rather than focusing on other people.

  • Grace123
    Grace123 Member Posts: 7
    edited 8. May 2020, 08:34
    Hi I’m sorry to hear you feel like this. I think the media have turned this into a bit of a competition and it really shouldn’t be. Every single person is experiencing changes to their lives to some extent and everyone is potentially struggling.
    I am not shielding but I am strictly social distancing. I’m a nurse and I’m having to work from home so I do feel very frustrated to have had a job I love taken away from me over night.
    My children are following the standard social distancing guidelines. They are both very active and used to being out all the time. They’ve had their worlds turned upside down. I think they’re allowed to moan and feel frustrated.
    Everyone is facing their own problems and they shouldn’t have to hide how they are feeling. Please don’t think it means people don’t care or are not aware that there are others are in a more difficult situation than themselves. Sending you best wishes at this very difficult time.
  • Mike1
    Mike1 Member Posts: 1,992

    Thank you Grace for putting my comments into context; I apologise for the way in which I framed my comments, on reflection I probably should not have commented on the subject in the first place. As I did mention I have dark days and it is often easier for me to descend into the abyss than pull myself up. You have my admiration and total respect.

  • Grace123
    Grace123 Member Posts: 7
    Hi Mike, my post was just really to highlight and try to reassure you that a lot of people facing their own problems do still genuinely care about others. It’s a very strange and lonely time and, as you say, it must be so hard for people who live alone. Take care xx
  • Lyn1066
    Lyn1066 Member Posts: 1

    Hi Mike, I am so sorry to read that this horrible, tragic and, as I often feel, frightening situation, is having such a profound affect on you. I cannot say truthfully that I know how you feel, although my mobility problems sound very similar to yours, I have my Husband and 32 year old Downs Syndrome Son to share my home with. I find my mood changing so dramatically from hour to hour and I have to keep reminding myself how lucky I am and not let the feelings of real terror of how I will cope if I should lose my Husband first. How Selfish does that make me sound!! I'm ashamed of these feelings and keep reminding myself how my glass is half full and not half empty. Do you like writing? I find it very helpful to write a sort of diary/journal, it is quite challenging to be totally honest with yourself. You will have helped a lot of people to understand things that they couldn't even imagine and you have my total admiration and respect for managing to share your feelings. Please know that I am thinking of you and praying for you to receive whatever will bring you comfort. Sending a big cyber hug.

    Lyn x

  • Aj_x
    Aj_x Member Posts: 206

    Hi Mike,

    Just a little versus arthritis message to you to wonder how you are doing?

    It is hard being in Isolation especially when the things that you used to do like driving etc has been taken away from you under no control of your own.

    I know you have said you don't want to talk to strangers but on a whim I have put the Versus Arthritis Helpline Number 0800 5200 520 just in case you would like to speak to someone.

    Also Lyn1066 you don't sound selfish at all. Why would you? If truth be told I am the same. I wouldn't cope at all if my husband was to go first.

    But on a lighter note, we are all here to speak to one another, the Helpline number is above and also I have attached the link for the Versus Arthritis website as well.


  • duffer
    duffer Member Posts: 46

    Hello Mike - I fully appreciate how you feel and avoid the news whenever I can - luckily my hobby is researching anything and everything I don't understand - with the exception of the virus (!). What we sufferers need is a painkiller that works, is safe and allows us simply to be independent. When the mind takes over and we feel lost I get angry with myself so I totally understand - but we do not need to be told about 'lasting effects' or stuff - there won't be any Mike - we are still who we were and the best most healthy and active all have their 'off' days as well so it's perfectly normal to get down. You sound like a strong guy and nothing can take that away from you - and it won't! Admitting how you feel sometimes is all it takes! Duffer.

  • KazandNoo
    KazandNoo Member Posts: 129
    Hi Mike1,I agree with what you said,it will be strange and difficult for people to be isolating but it's for the good of their health, better to be bored than risk the virus! And as you say,this is how it is for you most of the time,but you have your lovely cat Vixen who I'm sure helps. Cats are great company I find. Because of the prednisolone I'm on for psoriatic arthritis I'm in the "flu jab" group so I'm still at work but have to stringently social distance,which I do,I just wish others would too!