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Help with mattresses !!

My wife has to have a new hip and I have problems with my shoulders - we are keen to get a new mattress as the medium firmness one that we acquired 2 years ago is now proving to be uncomfortable - there seems to be sooooo many different bits of opposing advice ; some saying firm some saying soft - has anyone been through this before - so confused and the last thing we want to do is spend £1000 and get the wrong one !!


  • AlanMAlanM Posts: 30 mod

    Hi @paulmewis

    and welcome to the forum.

    You're concerned about having an appropriate mattress following your wife's planned hip operation and taking into account your own issues with shoulder pain.

    Obviously, as a charity we can't promote particular brands or commercial outlets; however, if you have a look at this link to our website, you will hopefully find some useful information about what to look for

    Others on the forum will undoubtedly pitch in with their own experiences.

    I look forward to seeing you on the forum and good luck with the mattress hunting!

    Best wishes


  • dreamdaisydreamdaisy Posts: 31,550 ✭✭✭

    Hello, this topic comes up again and again. My husband and me have two three foot mattresses zipped together, his side is medium, mine is firm. I cannot remember how the bases connect but we have the option of separating them when necessary such as illness or operation recovery. We spent a good five hours in John Lewis trying beds and pillows and ended up with mattresses handmade in Yorkshire, stuffed with all kinds of good natural things. They are very deep and heavy but I can still manage to turn and revolve them. We also bought Tempur pillows.

    We are due to replace them soon as they are seven years old - well, I think that way, he does not. I am thinking about no-turn memory foam, or possibly changing my three foot single for an electric version. I am steadily deteriorating thanks to psoriatic and osteorthritis which is why I need to replace. I will firstly return to John Lewis, armed with my Kindle and my pillows, plus my anti-bac spray; maybe this time next year if there's a vaccine (I am currently shielding and expect to be for some time yet). DD

    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • paulmewispaulmewis Posts: 4
    edited 20. Jun 2020, 13:56
    Thanks for the feedback - keep well and healthy - trip planned to John Lewis soon !!

    Hi, it's great to get advice on where you can go to try out different types of mattress, just remember there are many places to buy your particular mattress/pillows from. YvonneH x
  • Wasn’t looking for brand recommendations but advice on firmness ! Medium isn’t doing it for us but a few people have said soft mattresses are bad - but the soft one at my aged aunts house is lovely - any comments on firmness would be great !
  • Airwave!Airwave! Posts: 2,324

    We have tried a memory foam mattress which we found to be stifling hot and uncomfortable. Our present mattress is a queen size firm one with natural products covering it, we find it very comfortable, the base has a medium height and consists of a slatted wood design.

    In order to stop excess pressure on my shoulder, when on my side, I have a shaped pillow, from IKEA, it has larger diameter rolled edges and is of a firmer foam to support my neck as well. I find that lying on my back starts off numb patches in my lower body and a heat sensation in my lower leg so lie where I’m comfortable.

    its a grin, honest!

  • Mike1Mike1 Posts: 454 ✭✭✭

    After several different ones over the years I went to a well known bed shop - the one with the computerised pressure machine - and tried several out, I ended up with one that had around 1500 springs with a memory foam bit on top, since then I have added a feather filled topper. Still can't get a decent night's kip (only 2 or 3 hours) despite having an electrically adjustable bed too, but it is the best comfort I have had.

  • Hi.I am a new person to this forum, just wonder if anybody has any advice.

    I cant sleep later than 5am as my shoulders and other joints get painful and stiff, so though I would buy a new mattress that possibly may help.

    Does anybody recommend a supportive mattress and whereabouts would I be able to pursue one?

    On the webpages it says a foam one is good but then it says it may not spring back in time, so any advice would be gratefully appreciated.

    thanks for your time.


  • ChrisKChrisK Posts: 87 mod
    edited 21. Jun 2020, 16:06

    Hi @lindac222

    Welcome to our forum, you will find our members are very helpful, empathic and will support you and answer any questions as it has related to their own arthritis.

    The type of mattress you use is a very personal thing, what suits your friend may not suit you. It is a little more difficult at the moment with this Covid virsus. The shops that stock mattresses probably wouldn't like you to go and lay on them to try them out. The members on here will probably able to offer you some ideas and suggestions. Personally I prefer a firm mattress, and when I go away I often find mattresses that are softer and do not agree with me .

    Versus Arthritis also has a freephone helpline which is open Monday to Friday 9am to 8pm. The number is 0800 5200 520.

    I look forward to reading your future posts and hearing how you are grtting on.

    Best wishes


  • I’m a 5.00 am guy myself, I go to bed at circa 7.00 pm, I sleep/attempt to sleep on my back on a firm mattress, I have R/A and no expensive mattress is ever going to change that, irrespective of what the mattress sellers promise. Well that’s my view, like it or not, I hope that I am wrong, I often am.

  • frogmortonfrogmorton Posts: 25,115 ✭✭

    I have tried expensive mattresses too and my only advice would be to think twice about memory foam - blimey was I hot! THAT woke me up and then of course I was more aware of pain 🙄

    Also it seemed to get molded into my body shape permanently...how can that be good?

    As for firmness I still prefer medium firm and with a (is it wired?) edge so that when my husband gets up/moves it doesn't shake me about and wake me up again!!


    Toni xxx
  • Airwave!Airwave! Posts: 2,324

    Linda, Beware of what webpages say, the artistic prose they employ is to sell you what you think you want, The truth and the fantasy of you spending the right amount with them to convince yourself that you are doing the right thing can be far, far apart.

    Only buy from a retailer that has a long experience with their products, you can try different models with and that you can walk away from. You will be lying on a bed that you will spend a third or more of your life on, don’t buy on a whim. Once you’ve paid out, could you afford to do it again if the bed was wrong?

    its a grin, honest!

  • thank you so much for comment. agree that you cant believe what the manufacturers tell you,they only want to sell the product and i dont believe any mattress, however expensive, is going to make you free from stiffness and pain.

    dont want to be too negative but i guess when you develop arthritis, nothing helps unfortunately.

    wish i could wave a "magic wand" and there was a cure for it. ha ha.

    linda c.

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