Hitman Member Posts: 3
edited 24. Jan 2022, 10:16 in Chat to our Helpline Team

I am a man I was diagnosed with arthritis about 2 years ago they told me I have no cartlidge between my knee. I was always fit weights boxing and looking after myself. And now I find myself in constant pain 24/7. I've just turned 60 it's so hard I've not said anything to my family how I feel or how much pain I'm in I was brought up to get on with it. Take the pain and get on with it. But it's getting to much ìve been drinking. A lot,it makes my pain go away for about 20 minutes but for that I'm willing to pay the price. My mental health has deteriorated and I'm lost


  • YvonneH
    YvonneH Member Posts: 1,076

    I have talked with @Hitman and he is in need of our support. Thanks Yvonne x

  • Hi Hitman,

    Thank you for posting on our helpline forum, I am so sorry to hear how your pain is impacting on your life so much. Dealing with a long-term condition can be difficult, pain can also be made worse though periods of emotional stress which can have such an impact on our condition including arthritis.

    We often hear from men that it is wrong to show your pain and emotions and they should just get on with it even if they are in pain but talking does really help and you may be surprised if you were to talk to you family how supportive they may be.

    There is also lots of help available for people with arthritis either though your doctor who could prescribe medication to help with the pain, possibly a referral for physiotherapy who are part of a team of healthcare professionals who help you to resume or maintain an active and independent life both at home and work. They’re experts in assessing movement and can show you how to protect your joints.

    You also mentioned that you are drinking too much, by this I assume that you are referring to alcohol which is fine in moderation, but this can also affect how we feel and can have an impact on our mental health, you may feel fine that night and it may help with the pain but it is the next day it can affect us and the pain is often still there, please talk to you doctor about how this is making you feel and about the drinking, they may suggest referring you for therapies such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), which is a talking therapy, which tries to reduce the overwhelming effect of problems such as stress, unhappiness and pain.

    We are also here to help and support you in managing your condition so if at any point it would help you to talk things through informally and in confidence to one of our Helpline advisors about how you are feeling you are more than welcome to call our Free Helpline on 0800 5200 520 weekdays 9am – 6pm.

    Best wishes


    Helpline Advisor

  • Lilymary
    Lilymary Member Posts: 1,739

    Hi @Hitman , you really don’t have to suffer in silence. Have you been back to your GP? Arthritis does get worse over time, even for those who try to keep themselves fit and healthy, so it would be normal to review this from time to time, as it may get to the stage when other treatments are necessary, such as arthroscopy, steroid injections and ultimately knee replacement surgery. Meanwhile, pain relief is available, and you can talk this through with your GP also. It may be time for you to be referred to a rheumatologist if the condition has progressed that far. My sister is a fitness instructor, and had both knees replaced before she was 60 but is still working at 67. It’s also ok to ask for help from your family if there are certain tasks that are really hard for you to do now. Ignoring arthritis won’t make it go away, and accepting it or asking for help or treatment doesn’t mean you’re a weak person. It means you’’ve recognised a problem and are dealing with it. It can take a while to get your head round it, but denying it’s there and suffering in silence will only make it feel so much worse. Keep coming on here for advice or just for a moan, we all know how rubbish this feels, and it’s a really friendly supportive forum.

  • nicholaj
    nicholaj Member Posts: 64

    So sorry that this has hit you hard. I would just add to the words of advice that you have already hat that not only are in pain which is itself can be depressing but you have also had a loss…the loss of part of the fit and strong body which gave you pride.

    so you are dealing with the psychological implications of this as well as the painful ones. Be kind to yourself and accept that this will take time to adjust to.

    Please let the medics know that the pain relief you are having isn’t working well and hopefully there will be one for you which at least takes the edge off the pain in the way alcohol is doing at the moment. I imagine that surgery might be offered at some point.

  • Jona
    Jona Member Posts: 406

    Hi @Hitman

    I, like you, had been lost and brought up to just get on with things stiff upper lip and all that rubbish and I can tell by your post how much your struggling and myself being in constant pain is utterly soul destroying not to mention it does affect your mental well being but you must share with your family I kept it to myself the extent of the pain I can’t say the medical professionals have been that helpful tbh in fact I’m disgusted at the lack of care and understanding but once I’d shared it with my family and the people on this site it made me realise I’m not alone

    It doesn’t matter if we are male or female or how we are supposed to react to things we all count and matter talk to your family the help is out there honest

    take care and keep talking here I’m so glad I did 😊💪