OA in both knees and left hip. Patiently waiting for an op after my diagnosis 6 years ago and I just about manage the pain through exercise, stretches, turmeric oil and compression socks. For the first 5 years I just got on with things and only close family knew that I was in pain, which I prefer. But now the OA is in my hip I walk with a pronounced limp and EVERYONE from supermarket assistants to the postman keep asking me if I am ok - I know that this is done out of kindness but I just wish I could still walk a bit more normally - a bit of a shallow post but important to me. I am now turning down invitations as I don’t want pity - anyone else feel like this?


  • Chris_R
    Chris_R Moderator Posts: 764
    edited 21. Apr 2023, 17:42

    Hi @mosey55

    Welcome to the online community

    You write that you have Osteoarthritis of knees and left hip and are waiting for an operation for 6years.

    The pain is getting worse and you are limping which people have noticed and are concerned.

    Have you been back to your GP or consultant to update them on your level of pain and worsened Osteoarthritis? it might be worth a try to get your operation sooner.

    Here are a few links that may help

    I do hope the links help you in some way.Please keep in touch and tell us how you are getting on and do go onto our forums and chat to others it often helps to realise you are not alone there many like you and would love to try and help you on your journey and work through your arthritis with you.

    all the best Christine

    Need more help? - call our Helpline on 0800 5200 520 Monday to Friday 9am to 6pm

  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,600

    Hi @mosey55 and welcome from me too.

    I hate pity too. I just want to be treated like everyone else despite a huge limp and a body plainly showing over 60 years worth of rheumatoid arthritis.

    But I do think it's important that we don't mistake kindness for pity. I guess there's always going to be a mixture but I'm sure, if you saw someone yourself who looked to be having a problem, you'd want to help.

    Sometimes, just finding the humour in something can help lighten the situation. Sometimes people are just naturally curious. When a stranger asked me recently "Is it rheumatoid?" I said yes and was all set for the routine conversation about the differences when she asked "How long have you hsd it?" I told her and she proceded to list all the meds I'd ever taken starting with the early ones of aspirin, gold injections, penicillamine etc. I'm sure she must have been a retired doc. Very interesting.

    One thing I'd say is do try not to let it stop you doing things. Yes, sometimes we just can't due to pain or fatigue but not, I hope, due to a fear of pity. Because, as I said, it's not always pity. I think, more usually, ir's just kindness and that is soon re-paid one way or another. Ask about them. How they are? People are often very happy to talk about themselves and there own problems even if they're not the visible kind.

    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • Fran54
    Fran54 Member Posts: 167

    Hi @mosey55

    I also now walk with a limp ( have osteoarthritis in my right hip and knee ) and quite a few people have asked the same question. I tend to tell them the truth and most say are you having any treatment etc. They do seem genuinely concerned. I try to carry on with invites out like going for meals or meeting up with friends for a coffee but sadly have had to cut down on trips out going birdwatching which involves a lot of walking. I find I have to pace myself with what I do and if one day is going to be more energetic then the following day I try and make it a rest day. Also I have now purchased a walking stick and find this invaluable as it helps to keep my posture more upright and does help to stop me limping.

    Take care.🙂

  • mosey55
    mosey55 Member Posts: 3

    Thank you for your welcome and kind messages.

    i am currently under a Consultant and on the list for an op although it might be a long wait.

    But I do appreciate your comments and suggestions, thank you!

  • lin17
    lin17 Member Posts: 1

    I have been newly diagnosed with mild to moderate osteoarthritis in both knees and also have fibromyalgia, which I manage reasonably well (although painful).

    I have just joined the group and have been reading about how long people have been waiting for surgery, which hasn't really helped!

    You sound a similar mindset to myself and I hope as the arthritis naturally progresses that I too carry on 'doing things'. To be honest, at the moment I feel a bit down about it, but I will try and take your advice and hope I don't lose my sense of humour.

  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,600

    @mosey55 and @Lin , if it's any help, cycling seems to be a very good method of helping knee arthritis. We had one young chap on here who came to us in despair, bought a bike and never looked back. Once golf and long walks became impossible, my husband bought a static bike and used it to great effect before his two hip replacements. At first he could only manage about 3 minutes but, by the time of the ops he was doing three 20 minute sessioms daily.

    Good luck to both of you and, @Lin please don't lose your sense of humour. It's one of our best weapons against arthritis☺

    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • Lilymary
    Lilymary Member Posts: 1,733

    I was fortunate to have been fit and active most of my life until OA hit me from the blue at the age of 61, and within a year I could barely get round a supermarket, let alone up a mountain, even on handfuls of prescription drugs. I used a stick and lurched around as best I could, determined to keep going in some form or other. What I learned from this is how incredibly kind strangers could be. I was offered help, cut a lot of slack, doors were opened, dropped sticks were picked up, sticks left behind (!) were retrieved, i even got let off a parking ticket! I was up front with people about the reasons for my very pronounced limp,, and mostly people just wanted to share their own brushes with the dreaded OA and offer sympathy, but never pity. Yes, my incapacity made my world smaller, it still is to some degree, but friends and family, and work associates, have been supportive and accommodating. At the risk of sounding like a cheesy cliche, it was a humbling learning experience about kindness, and tenacity.