What would you do

suncatcher · 17. Apr 2010, 10:18

Hi after 7 mths of waiting my referal had been lost.I finally got to see a pyciatric support nurse. She just works with peoplewith long term illness and depresion ect. She is absolutly fantastic and totally understands.
I only had two visits so far. She mentioned i could get exercise theropy free for ten weeks ten sessions. I saw my gp and she filled the form for that.
I asked what else i could get she suggested counselling and as i enjoyed my chats with the nurse i said yes. I told my phyciatric nurse and she said i would not be able to see her anymore.
It would clash with the counselling and would be a waste of resources.
I am confused as my hubby says stick with nurse. but ive also wanted counselling for years but never been allowed it.
If this counselling dont work out would they let me go back to this nurse or not. am i best staying with this lady she is brilliant what would you do?

speedalong · 17. Apr 2010, 10:46

Hi Suncatcher - what a fab name and so apt today - it is a beautiful day here.

If it would me I would find out how long you will be seeing the psych nurse for. If it for a limited period then you could have the counselling afterwards.

You get counselling through different avenues - I'm just not sure what they would be in your area. For example a friend of mine has counselling and she was put in touch with one via her church ... Perhaps ask at the CAB or the local library?

But most importantly what is the lost referral for???!!! That is ridiculous ... have you notified PALS to see if they can speed up the process of having to start again. Also I'm sure there are time limits on how long a referral takes - this needs sorting out.

Speedalong

suncatcher · 17. Apr 2010, 11:11

speedalong wrote:

Hi Suncatcher - what a fab name and so apt today - it is a beautiful day here.

If it would me I would find out how long you will be seeing the psych nurse for. If it for a limited period then you could have the counselling afterwards.

You get counselling through different avenues - I'm just not sure what they would be in your area. For example a friend of mine has counselling and she was put in touch with one via her church ... Perhaps ask at the CAB or the local library?

But most importantly what is the lost referral for???!!! That is ridiculous ... have you notified PALS to see if they can speed up the process of having to start again. Also I'm sure there are time limits on how long a referral takes - this needs sorting out.

Speedalong

The referal was for this nurse so i was waiting for ages and now i got her. The gp never said i would have to stop seeing this nurse The hospital organized the referal which gp knows about and gp has suggested counselling which i presumed i would see both but it seems not so. If i turn it down it may not come again if i defer it they might think its not inportant and i dont really need it. Its just a shame.

dorcas · 17. Apr 2010, 12:51

Hi Joanne,

it is a bit of a dilemma :?

If you have already benefited from seeing the psych nurse it would be a great pity to stop seeing her. Finding someone that you have a rapport with isn't easy (my son has chronic depression so I am speaking from his experiences)

Did the nurse explain why counselling would clash with what she is doing?
I think.. that it may be because they come from different disciplines and rely on different theories and methods - so the focus and objectives week on week might not be compatible.
.....looking at it logically I don't imagine I could attend two therapists without getting confused?

It would be best to find that out though from the nurse so that what she said makes sense. :?

Can you find out if you can be re referred for counselling? that may help you in making the decision. x

I hope it all works out for you Joanne. ..after waiting for support it's just typical that you then get two offers and have to make a choice!

Iris x

ritwren · 17. Apr 2010, 13:14

It is a difficult one but I agree that it could be very difficult to see 2 people at the same time if they have different methods of counselling. The rapport you have with your nurse may be very good but she may not have the same skills as a counsellor and while she is easy to talk to she may not be able to help you in a similar way as a counsellor would. However there are many different schools of thoughts with counselling and the one you are referred to may not best suit your needs. The main body of thought is that counselling will give you the skills and insight you need to make the decisions, or understand what you need to as far as I understand it. If you are already getting this from your nurse then counselling could just confuse things.
I agree that it would be worth while seeing if you could be re referred so that if you pass up this opportunity you will still have that option for again. I can't think of any reason why this would not be so.
I know people who have gone for counselling when all they really wanted was someone to listen and help them come to a decision about things that are happening in their lives. If you are finding the relationship with your nurse to be therapeutic and helpful then I'd be inclined to stick with her and leave the more formal counselling for another time. But that's only my opinion. Whatever you do, I hope it works out best for you and the needs you have at the moment.
good luck, rita

angel1 · 17. Apr 2010, 13:57

Joanne, as a Counsellor myself, I was amazed that you state that you have been wanting counselling for years, but never been allowed it. The NHS lists are long, but everyone is entitled to be on them. There are also other organisations offering free counselling. Your GP should be able to help you with that.

With regards to your question, I feel that you need to ask yourself what exactly it is that you want from counselling. If it is support, and someone to just listen, then perhaps you will continue to get what you need from the lady you are already seeing. Counselling, however, aims to take things to another level, so that you become empowered to make changes within your life, and, hopefully, become stronger, and more able to deal with things.

The choice must be yours, although I personally can see no reason why you shouldn`t have professional counselling, backed up with the support from the nurse. I certainly would have no problem with that. Maybe it is all to do with cost.

Let me know if I can help in any way..........Ange.

frogmorton · 17. Apr 2010, 15:31

Hi Joanne

I think I would ask the doc whether or not you can go back to the psych nurse after you have the therapy or not. Then you can make an informed decision.

I can see that it might be seen as a duplication of services, but they ARE diferent aren't they? One is for depresion associated with longterm health issues and the other is about direct counseling. I can see the diference.

Hope you manage to sort it Joanne.

Love

Toni xx

oneday · 17. Apr 2010, 17:27

As the nurse is good and you get on with her i would stick with her and not stop seeing her, then try to see how you can have counselling after. Having confidence in the nurse must make you feel better for starters.
hope you get it sorted out, take care.

suncatcher · 17. Apr 2010, 19:04

angel1 wrote:

Joanne, as a Counsellor myself, I was amazed that you state that you have been wanting counselling for years, but never been allowed it. The NHS lists are long, but everyone is entitled to be on them. There are also other organisations offering free counselling. Your GP should be able to help you with that.

With regards to your question, I feel that you need to ask yourself what exactly it is that you want from counselling. If it is support, and someone to just listen, then perhaps you will continue to get what you need from the lady you are already seeing. Counselling, however, aims to take things to another level, so that you become empowered to make changes within your life, and, hopefully, become stronger, and more able to deal with things.

The choice must be yours, although I personally can see no reason why you shouldn`t have professional counselling, backed up with the support from the nurse. I certainly would have no problem with that. Maybe it is all to do with cost.

Let me know if I can help in any way..........Ange.

I was told i did not need counselling by the gp who i went to with a few problems i had to go fortnightly at first then it got less. I asked her if i could have professional counselling she told me i did not need it.
I have always been troubled by what i needed to see gp about back then.
I have had more changes since to manage. I have a good relation ship with hospital and never spoke of my troubles i had which gp knows about.
I am seen as copeing and in one way i do but it aint been easy. Now the gp and hospital are shocked i have developed depresion. You were copeing so well they cry whats happened?. My consultant now asks me about my depresion and the Ra has become second as that is now under control. I have been asked qusetions about home everything. Even though i had been referred to Phycological nurse to find out why.
The nurse was like talking to someone who was spot on with her understanding on all aspects.
I did want counselling still do so i can go back a bit in time.
I just hope the hospital dont see it as a snub i was not told by me asking for counselling it would rule out the nurse. I can see though they may have different approaches.

angel1 · 17. Apr 2010, 19:25

Have sent you a PM Joanne........Ange.

suncatcher · 18. Apr 2010, 17:37

Thanks for your replys it has made it clearer. thanks

What would you do

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