shopping with D

only49 · 22. Jul 2010, 12:55

hi

this morning i took D shopping with me, and he never stopped talking about t***s the t*** from the time we left till the time we got home, :roll: :roll:

even when i was driving the car, i was really trying to concentrate but it was very difficult, you could say he was so switched off, and in his own world he wasnt caring, typical of him and his autistic behavior, anyway while in the shoe shop as i had to get D some new slippers and myself some trying to get anything done was difficult and i remember thinking i wished i go by myself,

anyway got his slippers and then said to him he could sit on my scooter and look after it, and thankfully he was happy, so i got some help from an assistant for my slippers while D was happy, and even managed a bit of conversation as well, and i was telling that i had arthritis and she was very sympathetic and i enjoyed the chat.

anyway after that we both decided we had enough and came home, and as he knew his way from the garage that the car was kept in and was safe, i said off you go to the house D
i was glad to get home.

dreamdaisy · 22. Jul 2010, 13:08

It can all get very difficult can't it, only49? He is a lovely-looking lad - I've kept my pictures of him! - but it must be soooo tough to live with, especially as he is getting older in years but not in mental age. He is as he is, but do you sometimes wish you could wave a magic wand and change him, even just a little bit? It's always pleasant to chat to people - I'm glad you had a chance for a little adult conversation! DD

only49 · 22. Jul 2010, 13:48

dreamdaisy wrote:

It can all get very difficult can't it, only49? He is a lovely-looking lad - I've kept my pictures of him! - but it must be soooo tough to live with, especially as he is getting older in years but not in mental age. He is as he is, but do you sometimes wish you could wave a magic wand and change him, even just a little bit? It's always pleasant to chat to people - I'm glad you had a chance for a little adult conversation! DD

oh yes i do, but cant seem to get my hands on one lol, but would i really want
him to be any different well, maybe i just settle for a little less t and t but to be honest one of my biggest worries is getting people to understand how much help he will need in life, which is why years down the line we might have to consider moving south for D and my benifit as i really dont think there will be the help for him here, and besides ok living down south is not like living here, but it does have draw backs, still 3 weeks left of the summer hols D goes back on the 17 th august, made it this far i can survive a little longer, you know what they say " survival of the fittest" well i know thats not strickly true but if i can live with arthur i can live with D thats the easy bit, and i think its all for a reason.

dreamdaisy · 22. Jul 2010, 14:09

I can understand your dilemma, but even down south help for autistic adults is sketchy to say the least. It's not an easy situation - he's lucky to have you as his mum, tho. DD

only49 · 22. Jul 2010, 14:26

dreamdaisy wrote:

I can understand your dilemma, but even down south help for autistic adults is sketchy to say the least. It's not an easy situation - he's lucky to have you as his mum, tho. DD

its a long way away and besides we have to really think it through before we did it anyway, anyway me and hubby have family members living south so we see how things go over the years, anyway i am not going anywhere for years yet, but you have to think about your kids and especially as D a very special boy.

tkachev · 22. Jul 2010, 15:22

Hi Only,

Life is tough isnt it? Yesterday i dropped and smashed a bowl by mistake and Dan got upset and started carrying plates out into the garden to smash. Managed to stop that but later he tried to chop our washing line in half so now it is hanging by a thread!
All because I dropped a bowl!
Today he went to RAF Hendon with the school and started to jive with one of the band!
Elizabeth

tkachev · 23. Jul 2010, 04:44

Can i just add Sylvia that it is also very noisy and crowded down South. It is pot luck getting a good school and help for autistic children. I would love the peace and quiet of your Scottish Island.However you have to think of the family package as you have needs too.
Does D get to watch Thomas on the TV in the morning? 8.30 on channel 5 here.

Elizabeth

only49 · 23. Jul 2010, 10:09

tkachev wrote:

Can i just add Sylvia that it is also very noisy and crowded down South. It is pot luck getting a good school and help for autistic children. I would love the peace and quiet of your Scottish Island.However you have to think of the family package as you have needs too.
Does D get to watch Thomas on the TV in the morning? 8.30 on channel 5 here.

Elizabeth

oh yes he even records it on the DVD recorder, he watches it every morning and at weekends too on fiver, channel 30

i agree it is quiet here but because of that bit of water between us it can make life harder, and i cant do anything yet but when i come back from my holiday in farr near inverness, cant get internet access or mobile signal unless you go to inverness as it is in the middle of no where, along a single track road, but people treat the road as a 2 way road and go fast along there

I am thinking of changing my doctors practice as i dont think i gonna get any help from the practice i am with. but i look all into that when i get back, so needing to get away.

tkachev · 23. Jul 2010, 16:51

Oh bless. I will think of him when it is on.And you have a lovely rest too.

Elizabeth

speedalong · 23. Jul 2010, 17:07

Hi Only49,

S's specialised topics are TV idents and logos eg "BBC1 standing stone, 1996, looks like big stones and orange night sky ..." and the Powergen characters from ITV weather reports years ago .. eg "Aurora is hot and sunny and summer and dancing in the sun ..." So kind-of know what you mean ... he loves talking about all this stuff on his electronic communication aid. So I do know what you mean. When they first start talking about this sort of stuff we are delighted ... but over the years the novelty wears off!!

Footwear shopping with children (especially extra special ones) can be stressful though - so sounds like it was a successful trip despite your need for a change of topic!

Speedy

dreamdaisy · 23. Jul 2010, 17:18

I honestly have no idea how speedalong, tkachev and only49 manage. I have taught autistic and asperger's children, but I don't think I could live with one. You ladies are truly remarkable. DD

only49 · 24. Jul 2010, 05:21

dreamdaisy wrote:

I honestly have no idea how speedalong, tkachev and only49 manage. I have taught autistic and asperger's children, but I don't think I could live with one. You ladies are truly remarkable. DD

hi D D thanks for the kinds words it means so much, to answer your question, how do we do it, well we just learn to adapt and think like them i guess, the frustrating thing about it all as we do know how they think sometimes we do come across people that dont understand and we can help them to make life that bit easier for our kids if they listen and try the way that works best with our kids, as the saying goes " people in glass houses should not trow stone " and always try and see things from another's oint of view.

dreamdaisy · 24. Jul 2010, 06:34

People can be remarkably intolerant, can't they? Sometimes you hear/see a child throwing a massive tantrum in a shop and my first thought is always 'Hmm, could be autisitic and in overload' not 'Why can't the parents control that little ******?'. Getting people to understand isn't easy tho, even the so-called 'professionals' who deal with children like this all the time sometimes get it spectacularly wrong! I hope you and D, tkachev and her children, and speedy and S all have a lovely week-end. DD

shopping with D

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