Start the week with a smile

joanlawson
joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
edited 25. Feb 2013, 21:40 in Community Chit-chat archive
These might make you groan, but hopefully smile as well :!: :D
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I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on word

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pointless.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Velcro - what a rip off!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy..

Joan
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Comments

  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,697
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol: That was more than 'a' smile, Joan. Thanks.
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • villier
    villier Member Posts: 4,426
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol: Thanks Joan has brightened up my morning x
    Smile a while and while you smile
    smile another smile and soon there
    will be miles and miles of smiles
    just because you smiled I wish your
    day is full of Smiles
  • ichabod6
    ichabod6 Member Posts: 843
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Bloody hell, Joan. You're back and how.
  • constable
    constable Member Posts: 2,115
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol::lol: Brilliant. Thankyou.
    Karen xx
  • Numptydumpty
    Numptydumpty Member Posts: 6,417
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol: Excellent Joan :lol:
    It's good to have you back.
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Well, hello stranger! I hope you have been absent due to better things happening in your life but it is indeed lovely to see your name again. As one of my friend's mum said (far too many years ago now) 'I can't stand coffee mornings, they're not my cup of tea.' She couldn't see why it was funny. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thanks Joan they are brilliant.. :lol:
    Love
    Barbara
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thanks Joan :D

    Good to have you back

    love

    Toni xx
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    What a lovely welcome back :!: Thanks to one and all :D
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