Once upon a time............

tjt6768
tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
edited 9. Feb 2017, 08:06 in Community Chit-chat archive
Once upon a time there was a ruggedly handsome hero who was a very regular poster of true stories, mainly concerning a car named Ra.. Sadly, quite some time back now, our hero was kidnapped by a viscous gang of intergalactic space pirates led by a wicked creature named Woppum. She was a Clinghorn. Half clingfilm, half hornet :bee: . They were a very delicious and savoury race but the high council, a council of idiots high on kitkats, had named eating them because of their high calorific count.
Woppum has mistakenly taken our ruggedly handsome and buff hero believing him to be the 80's pop singer Terence Trent Derby. They had very similar features, as in both were human beings and both had bad hips.. Our hero because of the arthritis and Mr Derby because of his maniac like dancing on top of the pops.
Mr Derby had once slighted Woppum at a school fair. He had tried to wrap his egg custard in cling film and accidently grabbed her by the nostril..

True story..
TBC
Maybe. :?
e050.gifMe-Tony
n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
k040.gif
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP

Comments

  • daffy2
    daffy2 Member Posts: 1,636
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hey Tony, welcome back. I hope this isn't a fleeting visit?
  • mig
    mig Member Posts: 7,154
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hurray Tony's back ,missed ya mate.Migster. X
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Tony and a big Welcome back to the forum , you have been missed... :D
    Love
    Barbara
  • GraceB
    GraceB Member Posts: 1,595
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Tony! I saw your log-in name and am absolutely delighted! Welcome back.

    I look forward to reading more of your tales.

    How are you doing these days?

    GraceB
    Turn a negative into a positive!
  • applerose
    applerose Member Posts: 3,621
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Tony. Great to see you back. Hope you are keeping as well as possible.
    Christine
  • Turbogran
    Turbogran Member Posts: 2,023
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Yay big welcome back Tony have missed you and your stories hope you are back with us for a long time. :lol:
    Stay positive always👍xx
  • tjt6768
    tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    It became more than obvious that our athletic and handsome hero had been missed within the arthritic world and that he had to escape from the clutches of these interstellar pirates...
    His only hope rested with a small squid like creature that currently shared the damp and dank cell on the spaceship. The squid thing was named Phil and had unknown to their captures smuggled a tin opener within his folds..
    Our courageous manly hursuit intelligent calm and collected hero was to hatch a plan so cunning that it would go down in space history. Not since Kirk muddled with tribbles would there be such a fuss...

    TBC

    :wink:
    e050.gifMe-Tony
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    k040.gif
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • daffy2
    daffy2 Member Posts: 1,636
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    There are times when I could do with a tin-opener wielding Phil squid.....
  • tjt6768
    tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    They're only found when the moon is blood red, a Cockerell is wearing denim and the butterflies are flying backwards..
    True story :o:D
    e050.gifMe-Tony
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    k040.gif
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Tony are you still with us... :shock: or have you been kidnapped again... :lol:
    Love
    Barbara
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Well Tony have you come out of the woodwork because Leeds United are playing so well?
    Hope you are and your family are well...

    Elizabeth xx
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • tjt6768
    tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Yes my dear friends... your friendly muscular divine godlike hero is still alive but desperate to find his way out of this insane space situation. I bet Neil Armstrong never had this trouble :shock:

    Now.. the cunning plan.
    He would lure an unsuspecting guard into the cell where Phil would pretend to be having a heart attack.. clutching his groin (yep, Phil's heart was where his gubbins should be.. as for his gubbins, they were on his head :? ) the guard, baffled by such an unusual scene would raise an eyebrow.. as he did this our fabulous amazing gruff rough and tough hero would kick him in his bahoogies.
    Our precious vivacious tall groundbreaking hero kicked him so hard that one of his globules actually appeared in his mouth :o:o


    TBC
    e050.gifMe-Tony
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    k040.gif
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • mig
    mig Member Posts: 7,154
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol::lol::lol::lol:
  • Mrstjt6768
    Mrstjt6768 Member Posts: 19
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    What are you on about man!!! :roll: :roll:

    Has the hirsute hero A.K.A my husband had a shave yet???? :lol::lol::lol: