Why Am I Jittery Already?

elainebadknee

Hi

In 11 days I am to have TKR and ive been okay until last couple of nights...Just when im going to bed Im thinking stupid things such as "can I do this?", "will I be okay afterwards?"....I know its major surgery and I will be out of pain in the end.
Im frightened of making a twit of meself when Im admitted as I usually get teary, also dont want other patients to think Im a pain, baby as will take Sol my beany frog in with me, or cry out in pain or tell the nurses I cant undergo this operation, have a hissy fit....I was okay till few days ago but now im worried and I know its too soon...
I also have to go to Wigan twice this week, once for therapy education session on tues and on thursday to see anaesthetist as I have auto immune disease and he only works on thursday, same for theray educatrion.....

Sorry if im being a big kid.....

Elainexx

Helenbothknees

Elaine, you're not being a big kid; you're being perfectly normal. It's major surgery and it's very scary! Almost everyone feels like that. I didn't because I got a cancellation and only had two days notice, which meant I was so worried about my OH taking care of the cats, and the fact I hadn't managed to tell everybody I should have that I was going in, and had I told all the magazines I write for that articles would be late, and, and, and... But everyone else I've ever spoken to has been s*** scared before this op, including a nice lady I know who hasn't even got a date for her TKR yet but is already panicking. The nurses and other patients won't think you're silly if you cry or panic or anything else, as you will be far from the first. And definitely take your beany frog if that helps; you won't be the first to do something like that either. And after all that....once you get in there, there'll be other people doing the same thing, and if my experience is typical it'll still be frightening but it'll start to feel almost normal too, if that makes sense. Hang in there; you WILL be OK!

pinkbritishstars

aww you aren't being silly Elaine.

I will be thinking of you lots.

xxx

valval

putting your life in some one elses hands is a big thing we all feel scared if we think about it but they know there job and you will be so much better after we will be with you every step of the way and will not let you make a fool of your self val

elainebadknee

Helen

Maybe id have been better being told a few days beforehand, i dont know I was calm till the end of last week....My dad has had TKR and he was as sick as a dog afterwards, wish hadnt seen him like that...I know im a different person but will i waken up and think "what the hell have I done"....It'll be first time having epidural (know you were awake for your operation) but not sure i can do it without sedation, I dont want to feel or see anything but on the other hand id like someone to say to me "its nearly over, youre doing fine"....
I feel a twit honest, am sure they will think me absolutely off my rocker being a big baby...Its the unknown thats the scariest..

Thanks for your reply...

Elainexx

Helenbothknees wrote:

Elaine, you're not being a big kid; you're being perfectly normal. It's major surgery and it's very scary! Almost everyone feels like that. I didn't because I got a cancellation and only had two days notice, which meant I was so worried about my OH taking care of the cats, and the fact I hadn't managed to tell everybody I should have that I was going in, and had I told all the magazines I write for that articles would be late, and, and, and... But everyone else I've ever spoken to has been s*** scared before this op, including a nice lady I know who hasn't even got a date for her TKR yet but is already panicking. The nurses and other patients won't think you're silly if you cry or panic or anything else, as you will be far from the first. And definitely take your beany frog if that helps; you won't be the first to do something like that either. And after all that....once you get in there, there'll be other people doing the same thing, and if my experience is typical it'll still be frightening but it'll start to feel almost normal too, if that makes sense. Hang in there; you WILL be OK!

elainebadknee

Thanks Pink

Wish it was over n done with..

Elainexx

pinkbritishstars wrote:

aww you aren't being silly Elaine.

I will be thinking of you lots.

xxx

elainebadknee

Val

Yes it is scary putting your life in someone else's hands....and I seem to be fit and well, barring the auto immune disease but thats just for allergy purposes.....
Thanks for your message...

Elainexx

valval wrote:

putting your life in some one elses hands is a big thing we all feel scared if we think about it but they know there job and you will be so much better after we will be with you every step of the way and will not let you make a fool of your self val

Numptydumpty

Elaine, I'm sure everything you're feeling is quite normal. Of course you fear the unknown. It's a big thing having major surgery. I think it would be strange if you didn't worry a bit about it.
Just think of how much easier and better your life will be afterwards.
You can do this!
Thinking of you and wishing you well,
Numpty

Helenbothknees

It'll be first time having epidural (know you were awake for your operation) but not sure i can do it without sedation, I dont want to feel or see anything but on the other hand id like someone to say to me "its nearly over, youre doing fine"....
I feel a twit honest, am sure they will think me absolutely off my rocker being a big baby...Its the unknown thats the scariest..

You should be offered sedation as well. In fact, I think I was about the only person who refused sedation; I'm a bit of a control freak and I wanted to know what they were doing to me! But that's unusual. Most people want to be sedated, and I had to more or less insist that I didn't want any. Right up until I was wheeled into theatre the lovely anaesthetist was asking me if I was sure I didn't want a sedative, and even then he whispered to me that if I felt a bit anxious at any time and changed my mind, I only had to let him know. But I gather that with a sedative you might well be awake enough to know when someone assures you you're doing fine. And they won't think you're a twit. I never said (I forgot) that the one moment I got terrified was when I was being given the spinal anaesthetic. I was sure it was going to hurt, and I hate needles. I clung to the nurse like a little kid, and bless her; she put her arms round me and said I could hold on as hard as I liked; it was OK. So you see, they're used to it. Everyone gets scared. You're right though, having less time to worry was good, but I'm sure you'll be OK. And when you wake up....they'll give you morphine, and you'll feel VERY GOOD for a while. After that it does get tough for a short time, but just keep thinking that soon you won't be Elainebadknee any more; you'll have to change your name to Elainegoodknee!

hileena111

Elaine
You've been through so much when it actually comes you're bound to be jittery.
Blow what they think ......poor Sol would be so upset if he was left behind
I've only had a THR......you'll be fine....we are all jittery before such major surgery. Me....even before day procedures!!!!!!
Love
Hileena

elainebadknee

Hi Numpty

I could slap myself, its not life threatening surgery, there are risks but im being an ultra scaredy cat! I know life will be better afterwards i just wish someone could magic a wand over this period of time!

Thanks!

Elainexx

Numptydumpty wrote:

Elaine, I'm sure everything you're feeling is quite normal. Of course you fear the unknown. It's a big thing having major surgery. I think it would be strange if you didn't worry a bit about it.
Just think of how much easier and better your life will be afterwards.
You can do this!
Thinking of you and wishing you well,
Numpty

elainebadknee

Helen

yes I think i will need a wee bit of sedation i dont want to see any drills or anything about the operating theatre if possible.....Just something to take the edge off as I will have my music via my ipod which im hoping will help a bit?
God I hope the nurses, etc really dont think im a wally...I willl probably leave fingernail marks if they say i can put my arms round them? I am needle phobic too so what a palaver!

Thanks though for answering me today it is helping, Ive just got to be brave havent I?

Elainexx

You should be offered sedation as well. In fact, I think I was about the only person who refused sedation; I'm a bit of a control freak and I wanted to know what they were doing to me! But that's unusual. Most people want to be sedated, and I had to more or less insist that I didn't want any. Right up until I was wheeled into theatre the lovely anaesthetist was asking me if I was sure I didn't want a sedative, and even then he whispered to me that if I felt a bit anxious at any time and changed my mind, I only had to let him know. But I gather that with a sedative you might well be awake enough to know when someone assures you you're doing fine. And they won't think you're a twit. I never said (I forgot) that the one moment I got terrified was when I was being given the spinal anaesthetic. I was sure it was going to hurt, and I hate needles. I clung to the nurse like a little kid, and bless her; she put her arms round me and said I could hold on as hard as I liked; it was OK. So you see, they're used to it. Everyone gets scared. You're right though, having less time to worry was good, but I'm sure you'll be OK. And when you wake up....they'll give you morphine, and you'll feel VERY GOOD for a while. After that it does get tough for a short time, but just keep thinking that soon you won't be Elainebadknee any more; you'll have to change your name to Elainegoodknee![/quote]

elainebadknee

Hi Hileena

Yes im awful even for day case surgery to god help us all this time!
I do need Sol with me he will comfort me just a bit when im stressing majorly, did think about his big brother Woody but he is a bit big to take in!
Got me dad telling me all the time I'll be fine and he isnt waiting around that day to see me after me op as I'll be out of it!

Thanks lots!

Elainex

hileena111 wrote:

Elaine
You've been through so much when it actually comes you're bound to be jittery.
Blow what they think ......poor Sol would be so upset if he was left behind
I've only had a THR......you'll be fine....we are all jittery before such major surgery. Me....even before day procedures!!!!!!
Love
Hileena

Loulou11

Hi Elaine I've had to ops now without sedation but I did take in earphones with my favorite music on so I could drown out all the noises. It worked well and at one stage I was singing and tapping fingers to the music. I have my teddy that I've had since birth with me and it was a great comfort knowing he was there good luck with the op and try to think of the freedom it will give you xx

villier

Elaine you are not being silly or acting like a baby, you are acting like a normal human being, of course you are going to be nervous its major surgery, I was so nervous the other day and I was only getting a lip biopsy done my legs wouldn't stop shaking, as I said you woundn't be human if you were not nervous. You know everyone will be behind you on the day hope it comes quickly for you to get it over and done with.........tc.............Marie xx

barbara12

Elaine you are far from being silly, you are going over in your mind what most of us would do, I am terrified and haven't got to the point were I have a date yet , if sol make you feel safe then you take him, and if you have to shout out in pain then do so, one nurse said to me , just dont worry about things... we have seen it all over the years. ((((())) xx

elainebadknee

Hi Loulou

Oh kindred spirits with your teddy bear since birth, i love my frogs but realise aged 44 will look daft hugging them...It is a comfort thing and will help me...I couldnt do what youve done and commend you for it having no sedation but will have my ipod......

Thanks for lovely message..

Elainexx

Loulou11 wrote:

Hi Elaine I've had to ops now without sedation but I did take in earphones with my favorite music on so I could drown out all the noises. It worked well and at one stage I was singing and tapping fingers to the music. I have my teddy that I've had since birth with me and it was a great comfort knowing he was there good luck with the op and try to think of the freedom it will give you xx

elainebadknee

Hi Marie

I wish I wasnt so nervous even the dentist im gripping the chair!......I can only try and get through this week and then the countdown starts...
Thanks for support and nice message...

Elainexx

villier wrote:

Elaine you are not being silly or acting like a baby, you are acting like a normal human being, of course you are going to be nervous its major surgery, I was so nervous the other day and I was only getting a lip biopsy done my legs wouldn't stop shaking, as I said you woundn't be human if you were not nervous. You know everyone will be behind you on the day hope it comes quickly for you to get it over and done with.........tc.............Marie xx

elainebadknee

Barbara

I guess its cos its not my local hospital too i mean any operation ive had, only had to travel two mins up the road and been back home at teatime.....I was fine till friday then not sure why as ive got all this week and will talk to anaesthetist more....Sol does help, I may look a div but what harm am I doing and maybe they have seen far bigger babies than me being admitted...I hope Im not a pain to the nurses or other patients!

Elainexx

barbara12 wrote:

Elaine you are far from being silly, you are going over in your mind what most of us would do, I am terrified and haven't got to the point were I have a date yet , if sol make you feel safe then you take him, and if you have to shout out in pain then do so, one nurse said to me , just dont worry about things... we have seen it all over the years. ((((())) xx

Helenbothknees

Elaine, they will have seen........everything!!!! I've worked with the public, and after a few years nothing is new and nothing remotely surprises you.

jilly

Elaine , I am at the same hospital and they are really nice it is only a few miles from where i live. I have been terrified each time i have been in to have the ops , i think it is normal you cant expect to not be fightened. The staff are really nice and give you lots of help and reasurance .You will be fine and just think how good you will feel after it is all over and you have your llife back . I had 2 general anesthetics and a spinal for the last one , the spinal was the best , every one gets back to normal faster with a spinal . Before you know it you will be back in your bed having tea and toast . All the best jilly .

elainebadknee

Helen

I know, im just worrying making an **** of meself and thats daft....

Elainexx

Helenbothknees wrote:

Elaine, they will have seen........everything!!!! I've worked with the public, and after a few years nothing is new and nothing remotely surprises you.

elainebadknee

Jilly

Think thats part of it that i dont live near it as it was my second opinion choice...Im used to my local hospital but the surgeon there was an ***hole to me.....
I hope they dont think I am the prize plum and ultra big baby....I am scared of this spinal as hate needles just hoping its as painless and straightforward as most people say it is....The hard work starts the next day really when they get you out of bed dont it (will be a few swear words there)....

Thanks for your message..

Elainexx

jilly wrote:

Elaine , I am at the same hospital and they are really nice it is only a few miles from where i live. I have been terrified each time i have been in to have the ops , i think it is normal you cant expect to not be fightened. The staff are really nice and give you lots of help and reasurance .You will be fine and just think how good you will feel after it is all over and you have your llife back . I had 2 general anesthetics and a spinal for the last one , the spinal was the best , every one gets back to normal faster with a spinal . Before you know it you will be back in your bed having tea and toast . All the best jilly .

bubbadog

Elaine, Your not being silly! I'm sure everyone gets nervous before any operation, as has been said your putting your life in someone elses hands. But you have to think they are professionals and do it everyday, several times a day! I agree have sedation as it will make you relax. And when you wake up it will be over. Do something to take your mind off dwelling about the operation date! I get very nervous about going to the Dentist. Remember Elaine we will all be in your pocket as moral support!

dachshund

Hello Elaine
try not to worry you are being normal it will all go well i'm sure i've had a tkr thr and tripple fusion they all went well so will yours.
i will be thinking about you.
joan xx

elainebadknee

Hi Bubba

Well I only just came back from holiday last week but dont work of course so am going to think about it from time to time...My dad keeps joking too saying he wont come visit me every day as its a two hour round journey and its getting dark!....I know they are professionals its just ive only ever had minor surgery, arthroscopies, its been about 20 odd years since have had loose bodies taken out and they did that via a 3-4 inch scar, so me thats been the most major surgery! I think sedation is a must, I will need something to make me doze..

Elainexx

bubbadog wrote:

Elaine, Your not being silly! I'm sure everyone gets nervous before any operation, as has been said your putting your life in someone elses hands. But you have to think they are professionals and do it everyday, several times a day! I agree have sedation as it will make you relax. And when you wake up it will be over. Do something to take your mind off dwelling about the operation date! I get very nervous about going to the Dentist. Remember Elaine we will all be in your pocket as moral support!