Flare up for Christmas :(

ouchpotato
ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
edited 29. Dec 2013, 14:45 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hello everyone

I think I am getting an early Christmas pressie in the form of a flare up. I feel HORRID! Pain has increased dramatically, and whereas the pain usually eases when I've been up a while for the past 3 days it is not easing at all. I feel crumby, and fluey and in so much pain. I've tried to keep off the cocodamols to see if they are what are causing the brain fog but no chance of going without any or I will have to be pulled down off the ceiling! It's making me grouchy and short tempered which is not good timing when I have a very excited 9 year old waiting for father Christmas to come!

So, what advice can you give? I have cocodamol, hot water bottles, heat spray, ice spray, heat patches...hot bath helped temporarily. Are there any other tricks of the trade? I am hoping that it eases before Wednesday.

Thanks all

x
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Comments

  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Ohh I'm so sorry Ouch
    I think you have got everything covered.......Hopefully someone else will come up with more ideas but that's the tricks I would use......sorry

    Lots of ((((()))))

    Love
    Hileena
  • mike26
    mike26 Member Posts: 416
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    hi ouchpotato
    sorry to hear your fealing rubbish,
    could you phone youre roomy nurse and mabee some (prednisolone)
    tabs, to get you through this rough patch.
    hope it gets better for you.
    mike26 :noel:
    merry xmas to you :santa:
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Mike

    I wasn't given a number for a nurse? I had my first follow up with the rheumatologist last week, and she has diagnosed quite widespread OA, but I am still being investigated for an inflammatory arthritis so at the moment I don't even have a follow up booked; she will only see me again if the MRI and bloods (sometime in new year) show inflammation. So I've been left in limbo a bit really.

    Max dose cocodamol isn't really touching it.

    Sometimes being a single mum sucks...I just want to curl up and cry but I can't!!!

    x
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    And a merry Christmas to you too :carolers:
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    This is a stressful time of year and, as we all know, arthritis is rather partial to stress (in the same way that I am rather partial to chenin blanc :wink: ). All I can suggest is resting whenever you can and not to fret too much about the things which aren't done. It's one day, that's all, little ones only have one thing on their minds (and complete incomprehension about the rest of the malarkey we think Christmas should entail). Right, I'm off to empty another box or two. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Welcome back DD! Hope you are taking your own advice? :xmas_cheesygrin:

    I'm not too stressed about Christmas in all honesty, money has been tight this year and the kids all know that and understand. But I have been feeling guilty that I can't give them the Christmas they deserve, so maybe guilt is manifesting itself into pain?

    I think I will just have to stay warm, pace myself and make sure I have enough cocodamol to keep the edge off it.

    :noel:
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello ouch
    Sorry you are in so much pain, and with a family to look after..wish I could help...have you no one to take care of the children while you get some well earned rest..you look after yourself....(((())))xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • Boomer13
    Boomer13 Member Posts: 1,931
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Ouch;

    I wouldn't underestimate the stress that feeling guilty causes and especially since you are a single mum. The pressure is not shared with anyone else. I am sorry you are in flare-mode. I'm joining you this Christmas. It's very inconvenient timing! :xmas_cry:

    ((())),xxAnna
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Ouch and thank you for the welcome back, I have to say it's lovely to be here because AC has been a major part of my life since 2010. I miss it when I can't contribute.

    Am I taking my own advice? Yup, I have not sent a single card (I refuse to feel ashamed about it) and only two people have presents, namely Mr DD (7) and my friend Wendy (1). I've mislaid hers thanks to the move and his are labelled in the order I bought them (starting in January and forget the kindly-worded tags, I'm tired). :wink: I appreciate that I am lucky in that it is only the two of us, and our expectations of the festive season are low (his because they always are and mine because I am worn out after the move) but it is only a day and then it's done. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I have to say I don't 'do' Christmas for extended family - it really is confined to my three children and my mum.

    The Christmas presents themselves are easy - I keep a list of anything the kids mention throughout the year, or anything that I think they will like, and then I have a ready made list when it comes to December. I do find Boxing day is a much more relaxed time, and more enjoyable in many ways - the stress is missing, the frantic present opening is over and dinner is leftovers and pickles, and the expectations are gone. It's a nice day.

    Anna, I'm sorry you are flaring too, I hope it gets better before Christmas.

    Barbara, sadly I truly have no one to take over for a while. We fled domestic violence and have moved several times to stay 'under the radar' so left family and friends behind. Because we've not been anywhere long enough to put down any roots I have no good friends around me. It's very isolating but the price I've had to pay to keep the kids safe. My oldest is 19, but she is not here often, and is expecting her own baby so is pretty wrapped up in her world, and my son is 16 and is always busy so much of the time it is just me and my little one. To be fair none of them are any trouble, but just to have someone to share the load would be so nice.

    x
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Bless ouch I am so sorry..its just not fair that you have to suffer like this because of one violent individual..I wish I live near to you I would help, but at least you have us lot to talk to.. your cyber friends...you look after yourself and you know were we are....many hugs coming your way...(((())))..wish I could give them for real xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Ah thanks Barbara. :xmas_cheesygrin:

    But despite everything I am happy. We were fortunate in that we got out of the situation, and had lots of help from various authorities and groups. It may be my fault that I have no one close, but I have learned not to trust people easily so have become rather insular and self sufficient. But myself and the children are extremely close, and they are all a huge blessing.

    Hugs are always welcome though

    x
  • villier
    villier Member Posts: 4,426
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Here's a few more ouch (((()))) hope you feel a bit better in time for Santa...............Marie xx..........here's a few carols to cheer you up :carolers: :presents1:
    Smile a while and while you smile
    smile another smile and soon there
    will be miles and miles of smiles
    just because you smiled I wish your
    day is full of Smiles
  • dibdab
    dibdab Member Posts: 1,498
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Ouch,

    Sorry to hear that you're struggling. I wonder whether it's worth asking a pharmacist of there are any anti-inflammateries that you can take with coco's to crank up the pain relief? I know I can take ibuprofen and cocos because they are different families of drugs-but you need to be wary of drug interactions- we have a lovely local pharmacy who are always happy to advise.

    Hope it settles a bit very soon, maybe it is the Christmas pressure taking its toll :xmas_cry:

    Here are few more hugs {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}. Maybe you could try a duvet day with your young one- Disney movies and nothing energetic- just a bit of you time to recuperate.

    Deb xx
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Deb, I can't take anti inflammatories unfortunately as they make me ill, even the rheumy wouldn't give them to me.

    I am stressing slightly about last minute things I need to get. Potatoes, veg etc. I wanted to go after midnight tomorrow night to avoid xmas eve crowds but a) the weather isn't looking too promising and b) I thought my oldest would be here but she is staying at her boyfriend's and I don't really want to leave my son in charge of my little one (I am still paranoid that HE will turn up). I will now have to go on xmas eve morning, but that will be a nightmare as my mum is arriving at midday and I will have to have it all done by then (taking her shopping is bad at the best of times, I couldn't cope with it when it's manic). me and the children always go to costa on xmas eve and have hot chocolate and a cake (we've done it for years) and we will also have to have that done by the time she comes as she hates coffee shops, and would just drink water and complain about it and spoil yet another thing for us.
    (I would do it tomorrow but don't get paid until xmas eve)

    x
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    ouchpotato wrote:
    Ah thanks Barbara. :xmas_cheesygrin:

    But despite everything I am happy. We were fortunate in that we got out of the situation, and had lots of help from various authorities and groups. It may be my fault that I have no one close, but I have learned not to trust people easily so have become rather insular and self sufficient. But myself and the children are extremely close, and they are all a huge blessing.

    Hugs are always welcome though

    x
    I'm so glad you and the children have stuck together through all this...shows what a good mum you are..I hope you can get some relief very soon...look after yourself...((((())))xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • bubbadog
    bubbadog Member Posts: 5,544
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Ouch, hope you had a good Christmas day and didn't suffer to much and the family enjoyed themselves. I do hope you found a way so the pain didn't interfere with your enjoyment of the day.
  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Ouch
    How did things go? Are you still in one piece :wink:

    Love
    Hileena
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    And breathe.......

    Aaarrgghhh....how stressful has this been? She is still here but going home tomorrow (I hope, as long as the weather isn't too bad). In parts it's been ok, but the horrid things counteract the occasional nice ones. In no particular order...

    I would look quite nice if only I would get rid of the big bulge around my tummy.

    She kept asking my youngest to ask me to touch my toes...when I eventually bit and said to her that actually it wasn't very nice taking the p**s out of someone who has just been diagnosed with spinal arthritis she laughed til she cried.

    I bought crackers that had wind up santas and reindeer in,,,the idea being that you raced them along the table after dinner. Which we did. And it was fun. Until she demanded all 6 of them to take home with her. I told her she had the one out of her cracker and she said she wanted all of them, so I gave her mine. Then she said it wasn't enough, she wanted all 6 of them, and got really annoyed when the kids said no, they wanted them as souvenirs of this Christmas (we are all the sort of people who keep champagne corks from special occasions, or movie stubs etc). Then she tried bribing the kids, saying she'd pay them a pound each for their, and then sulked when they refused. My son videoed one of the races, and when she realises she went mad, telling him he was not to put it on you tube or anything, and that his mates would all be taking the p**s out of her (like they are bothered about her)...the best part of it was none of us were actually in the video, it was just of the racing santas and reindeer. My son then deleted the video because he was so mad with her for spoiling it.

    She tormented the dog. She kept asking him where his lead was, and he'd go and get it and then she'd cackle at him looking hopeful and then she'd put his lead away and do it all over again. When I told her to stop tormenting him as it was cruel and she was upsetting the kids she said I was trying to take away her only bit of pleasure!!! Then she kept throwing rubbish at him when she thought no one was looking.

    She followed me around the house, cleaning. If I put a cup down with tea still in it she'd try and take it away and if I wasn't finished she'd stand there with her hand out waiting for me to finish so she could wash it up. if I put something in the bin she would take it out again and go outside to the wheelie bins and put it in there. I caught her cleaning the inside of my cupboards. We told her we wanted to watch Dr Who on Christmas night and we wanted to concentrate on it...she waited until the end bit, the last 5 minutes (the most important bit) and decided to stand in the middle of the room talking loudly so we missed it.

    I am boring for not drinking (I spent the whole time dosed up on cocodamol and didn't want to risk alcohol).

    She bought herself a pair of jeggings!! She's 81. She put them on, jumper tucked in, and asked did they look good. They looked awful. I told her they would be ok with a long top as that is how you should wear them anyway and she got really annoyed with me for not saying they looked fantastic. Seriously, they looked hideous.

    If we watched anything she didn't like she would spend the time yawning loudly and frequently, totally spoiling the viewing, and yet she asked me to put emmerdale on for her, and when I did she walked out of the room and sat in the other room.

    It's been exhausting. She has now gone to bed in a huff because she wanted to put the wheelie bins out for the collection tomorrow and I told her to leave it and my son would do it. She insisted she would do it, I told her no, that the garden was dark and she wouldn't be able to see where she was going and that there might be dog poo out there. Needless to say she ignored me, went out, took the bins out and stood in dog poo!

    Before she even took her coat off when she arrived she took all my mugs and filled them with soap powder and water to get the tea stains out! She makes me feel as if my house isn't clean enough or tidy enough for her and it REALLY pees me off. My house is clean, but I have 3 kids and a dog and it is comfy and lived in and homely. Hers is cold, and clinical and spotless.

    Phew...it feels a bit better getting that off my chest. I just hope the weather doesn't stop her going tomorrow because I feel like I will explode with another day of this.

    Hope you have all had a good Christmas.

    Love always

    x
  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh Ouch
    What a miserable Christmas she has made it for everyone.
    I do hope the weather isn't too bad and that she goes.....is she likely to make an excuse if it is a little windy or rainy and decide to stay? I do hope not. You have done your share.
    I could no more touch my toes than fly to the moon with my spinal arthritis ...not sure that I could do it easily before that anyway :lol:
    What on earth is she going to do with ALL the cracker presents?
    Something to remember it by ...but ALL of them :roll:
    Her house sounds like a house and yours sounds like a home.....a big difference.
    As for stained tea cups.....tea is a devil for staining......I know if think anyone {special is coming over} I have to check all mine :lol:
    A little bit of bleach and left for a while , then rinsed out well does the job but I certainly don't do that all the time. :?
    An 81 in jeggings with a top inside sounds funny :lol:
    Even I were tops outside these days :lol:
    I do hope for your sake the weather is OK and she goes home then you can get back to normal.
    Hope you have a much better New Year
    Love
    Hileena
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,285
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh my GOODNESS Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    What a time you've had :shock:

    Roll on tomorrow is all I can say :xmas_evil:

    Naughty naughty lady. Next year you should all book a lodge in the Scottish Highlands which sleeps only you lot and ENJOY yourselves!!!

    Every paragraph added yet another nastier thing to the list of her 'wind-up' behaviours :roll:

    I cannot believe you are still sane!

    sending you some ((())) and some Mother-tolerating-strength - a bucketful

    c045.gif

    love

    Toni xxx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Ho ouch
    I got half way through that and that..you really needed to get all that off your chest...some people can be so blinking selfish and horrible...all I say about people like that is they must be so miserable wherever they are...you have a quality that some dont have and that is you do your very best for your family...now put those feet up and hopefully you can all enjoy some peace.
    You look after yourself...((((())))xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello all

    Thanks for all the posts. At the moment I still have my 'guest' but she is going home later. What I forgot to add is that she had about three vitriolic racist rants while she was here. I am the least racist person you could ever meet, and I have brought my children up to be the same; I cannot abide hatred.
    She is openly and loudly racist, in private and in public, and won't shut up even when I tell her to stop. Most of it is directed at muslims, although most foreigners cop it too. We were actually eating Christmas dinner, and she started...a rant full of poison, and hate. She was actually spewing the stuff out.

    This morning she is still going on about the cracker toys! I know it must read as if she has some kind of senility but believe me, she hasn't. She has always been this way, and she is fully in control of all her faculties. She is just...I hate to say it...but she is just not a nice person.

    Tonight I will have a full house again, my daughter's boyfriend and my son's girlfriend but it will be easy!

    Well, I hope the weather isn't too bad where you all are.

    Take care

    x
  • dibdab
    dibdab Member Posts: 1,498
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh boy Ouch- you deserve a medal for coping with all that!!!!!!!!!!!! I bet you're counting minutes until she leaves. At least you had you children to support and care about you- and she will be alone again very soon. You know in the final analysis you will have nothing to regret or blame yourself for with your mum- apart from not resorting to the naughty step :shock:

    Hope the next few days are much calmer and more fun. Take care.

    (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) top up hugs for the next little while till she's gone and you get your home back!

    Deb xx
  • ouchpotato
    ouchpotato Member Posts: 453
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Aaaahhhhh....peace and kindness is restored once more!

    She rang my sister in Oz while she was here, and proceeded to complain that she hadn't drink a lot over Christmas as I hadn't drunk anything and she doesn't like drinking alone. (She has a real beef about me not drinking). I bought wine for her but unless I drank she wouldn't. The thing is I am the only one who the kids can rely on if they are ill or something happens so I need to be able to drive, and at the very least be level headed and sober. Also I am on too much medication to want to risk drinking too. And lastly I fear I would say what was on my mind if I drank, haha.

    Here is an example of a conversation with her.

    Her 'Why do I keep getting text messages from 02 with these offers?'
    Me 'It's just what they do'
    Her 'But I don't want them'
    Me ' well it gives you the option to text stop to that number and they will stop.'
    Her ' I can't be bothered'
    Me 'Well then you will have to put up with the texts.'
    Her 'I don't want to put up with them. Why should I have to go to the trouble of texting them?'
    Me 'you don't, but they won't stop until you do'
    Her 'It's a bloody cheek.'
    Me (silence)
    Her 'so how do I get them to stop?'
    Me 'you text the word stop to that number'
    Her 'I already told you...I. Don't. Want. To. Do. That. I. Cant'. Be. Bothered.'
    Me, leaving room before I explode.

    This is what every single conversation was like, for the entire Christmas. I am soooooo tired!

    Ah well, that's it for another year. :xmas_cheesygrin: