Hi folks, I'm Elaine and just feeing really down at the moment. Had 2 arthroscopies , 1 on each knee since November and frankly feeling nakred as usual and am wondering why they bothered, but it's because of my age and I'm too 'active' so they don't feel they should do anything else yet and I've listened to them saying this for the last 5years, so now they think it will have appeased me, but am just wondering why they bothered. Sick of being this middle age person that just isn't young or old enough that they feel they have to do anything as it's only osteoarthritis. Am sick of hearing people say it and not knowing how damn tired I get. I currently live alone as daughter at Uni and son moved out due to problems I was having with his now x girlfriend and he prob won't come home full time cos why would you want to live in a house that your mum expects you to help out, as she's too damn tired to do it herself. I feel lazy due to not doing enough and sick of living in a house that I just haven't got the energy to do things. Am not a person to ask for help and often feel that people just say they'll help when in fact they're just too busy themselves and you ask local services for ideas for help and they just send you a leaflet or book and expect you to ring round and cos I'm not on low income its all then expected to be paid for and I have to work to keep the house and pay the bills. It's just all a constant vicious circle. Sorry for being miserable but am sure you all know what it's like. Thanks for allowing me to offload.