What do you do to keep sane?

Supermand
Supermand Member Posts: 17
edited 5. Feb 2025, 20:40 in Living with arthritis

I've always written poems and amended songs and I find it helps a lot especially when I'm feeling down. I've had joint problems for nearly 50 years so I need something especially when I'm waiting a long time for appointments. Today I amended The Proclaimers song 500 Miles.

500 PILLS

When I wake up, well I know I'm gonna be,

I'm gonna be a woman in pain all the day

When I go out, yeah I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be a woman groaning all the day

If I stay in, sitting down I’m gonna be

I'm gonna be a woman with painful joints

And every day, I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be getting more affected joints

And I could take 500 pills

And I could take 500 more

But pain killers do absolutely no good

Of that I am completely sure

Hopefully this will amuse some. I feel a smile takes your mind of your pain for a second or 2.

Comments

  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 30,322

    LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    Brilliant take on a memorable song!

    Thanks😊

    Toni x

  • PeterJ
    PeterJ Administrator Posts: 1,058

    Brilliant - love them

    Need more help? - call our Helpline on 0800 5200 520 Monday to Friday 9am to 6pm

  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,764

    I do like these @Supermand . Keep 'em coming. We used to have a lot of fun threads. I think the Christmas carol pastiches were the most popular https://community.versusarthritis.org/discussion/41128/christmas-carols-for-arthritics . But we also had somg and film titles. They'll all be there in the archives somewhere. Unfortunately there seems no appetite for shall we say the fun side of arthritis now. Pity.

    By the way, whatever made you think we were sane😆

    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • Skinny Keef
    Skinny Keef Member Posts: 1,287

    Now I’m gonna have that song stuck in my head All Day!!!

    😁

  • Ariana
    Ariana Member Posts: 34
    https://community.versusarthritis.org/discussion/60465/what-do-you-do-to-keep-sane

    @Supermand Ha, brilliant, it made me laugh 500 times and more!😊

  • Vindem
    Vindem Member Posts: 2

    Great Stuff Supermand!

    What I do is this:- I think like a Contrarian in doing the opposite to what is expected as a way to get back in control of my thinking about a problem that won't be dealt with & only made worse by worrying about - SO I do the opposite & do my BEST & BIGGEST SMILE for as long as I can hold it whilst making myself RELAX TO REPAIR - mentally! . I can then feel a change happen in my mind & my body as it is not possible to smile & worry at the same time & also it can have quite an effect on others around you as it can surprise them in a very nice way while helping yourself as well.

    Never under estimate the POWER OF A SMILE! on yourself & others. I do it as soon as I open my eyes first thing when I wake up, then do my exercises in bed before I get out. You have to get in the habit of it to get results but its worth it to get in control & not be dragged along by events. This Is the best & easiest exercise ever .Try it now! - Good Luck! - Vindem.

  • Ellen
    Ellen Moderator Posts: 1,956

    Good morning @Vindem welcome to the Online Community. (Apologies @Supermand for hijacking your thread to welcome Vindem)

    What great tips there. Especially the smile😊 Always good if you can to start the day so positively. You are indeed a contrarian.

    Our mental health can be impacted hugely by living with a long term condition such as Arthritis. I doubt you need to read this, but there's good stuff in this:

    https://www.versusarthritis.org/about-arthritis/managing-symptoms/emotional-wellbeing/


    Lovely to meet you.

    Best wishes

    Ellen.

  • Supermand
    Supermand Member Posts: 17

    As I said I don't only re-write songs I write poems too.

    Here's the first one I wrote, hope you like it.

    ARTHRITIS IS A PAIN IN THE ARMS.

     Knackered ankle, wrist and knee

    Is there anything right with me?

    NSAIDs, steroids and other pills

    There must be something to cure my ills.

    Replacement elbow that’s become bionic

    When my pain was diagnosed as chronic.

    Orthos, rheumatics and physiotherapist

    There’s no joint department that I’ve missed.

    X-rays, scans and MRI

    Every type of view they try.

    Blood tests and injections, there is no doubt

    If they weren’t putting something in they were taking something out.

    Panics, worries and all sorts of alarms

    ARTHRITIS IS A PAIN IN THE ARMS.

  • Jan1955
    Jan1955 Member Posts: 26

    So very true..thank you for your post..Jan x

  • Pegasus64
    Pegasus64 Member Posts: 4

    So very funny 🤣

  • Jewels1973
    Jewels1973 Member Posts: 58

    Loved all of them because they are so very true! Same here I will have those songs going around in my head tonight. Well done to you both x

  • Lizziejayne53
    Lizziejayne53 Member Posts: 15

    These are absolutely brilliant and certainly raised a smile 😁; a true talent here.

    Thank you for brightening my day x

  • Supermand
    Supermand Member Posts: 17

    Here's a quick little one!!!

    Dem Bones – Damn Arthritis!

    Your toe bone was connected to your foot bone

    Your foot bone was connected to your ankle bone

    Your ankle bone was connected to your leg bone

    Your leg bone was connected to your knee bone

    Your knee bone was connected to your thigh bone

    Your thigh bone was connected to your hip bone

    Your hip bone was connected to your back bone

    Your back bone was connected to your shoulder bone

    Your shoulder bone was connected to your neck bone

    And then arthritis destroyed the lot!

  • Supermand
    Supermand Member Posts: 17

    Hi Guys

    I've got a new song for you.

    I wrote this today, I hope you like it!

    Everyday (Buddy Holly’s song)

    Everyday pains are getting stronger

    Don’t think I can take this pain much longer

    Wishing arthritis would just go away

    A-hey, a-hey hey


    Everyday more joints are affected

    As it gets worse, I get more dejected

    Some treatment must surely come my way

    Someday, a-hey hey


    Everyday pain cuts like a knife

    Stuck with this for the rest of my life

    Wish I had something to look forward to

    Apart from surgery!

  • Supermand
    Supermand Member Posts: 17

    Hi All

    Been a bit quiet for a while as I've been a bit busy with appointments etc but I;'ve re-written a new song which I hope you'll like, it's to the tune of ABBA's The Winner Takes It All.

    ARTHRITIS TAKES IT ALL (To the tune of ABBA’a The Winner Takes It All)

     I don’t wanna walk

    ‘Cos walking just hurts bad

    Sport was life to me

    Now that's history.

     I played sports each day

    ‘Til arthritis got me

    Nothing more to say

    Now I cannot play.

     Arthritis takes it all

    Joints fail & make me fall

    Docs, ops & tests for me

    That’s my destiny.

     I was at college

    Thought I’d be a teacher

    Wanted to teach PE

    That’s what I wanted to be

    That was my lifelong dream

    Thought I’d be a good one

    But I was a fool

    Life can be so cruel.

     It’s like a lottery

    Why arthritis chose me

    I know I shouldn’t complain

    Being left so lame.

     Arthritis takes it all (takes it all)

    I’m just left to fall (left to fall)

    I know I shouldn’t complain (shouldn’t complain)

    But I’m going to all the same! (all the same)

     

  • Supermand
    Supermand Member Posts: 17

    Hi All

    Haven't given you a song/poem for a while so here is one that I don't think I've put up before.

    LONG LATIN NAMES

    (to the tune of Don McClean’s American Pie)

    A long, long time ago

    I can still remember how playing sports

    Used to make me smile

    I also played all sorts of games

    Until the ills with long Latin names

    Made me unable to play anymore.

    My GP said she couldn't help me

    An Orthopaedic surgeon I must see

    Bad news I've Arthritis

    There is no cure for this.

    I can't remember if I cried

    Because my dream of teaching PE had died

    But in order to keep my pride

    I must always be dry-eyed

    [Chorus]

    So bye-bye playing sport anymore

    Got to find some new hobbies ‘cos my joints are so sore

    The docs do nothing but replace them I’m sure

    Still anything that stops pain is good

    Anything that stops pain is good.

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