My best friend

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  • joanlawson
    joanlawson NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    dorcas wrote:
    Joan,

    I am so sorry to hear about your dear friend's diagnosis.

    I lost a very close friend to cancer some years ago and the one thing she told me she valued over everything else was being able to talk freely about how she was feeling.... sometimes it's just being there that is the most important gift we can give someone we love.

    I wish I had the power to change this for you and your friend and I do hope that the docs will find the expertise and knowledge to provide a cure if possible; but if not then the right level of support, care and treatment.

    We are and will be here for you Joan every step of the way.

    sending you and your friend much love, strength and support. Iris x

    Thank you for your kind words and support, Iris.
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  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Joan,
    I am so sorry I have only just seen this thread, has you say your friend seemed so calm on the phone, I have lost most of my family to cancer, and the one thing I have notice is the inner strengh they have.
    I know that you just being there will mean so much to her, how lovely that you became such good friends in the first place.
    You take care
    Lots of love and hugs ((((())))
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Thank you, Barbara.
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  • annebr
    annebr NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 730
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Joan,

    I don't know what to say? I am so sorry to hear about your friend. My thoughts are with you both.

    Love Anne xx
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Thank you, Anne. You are very kind.
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  • suncatcher
    suncatcher NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 2,174
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Im really sorry to hear about your good friend my heart goes out to all concerned. you are in my thought s from joanne
    Joanne
  • katekelly
    katekelly NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 975
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hello Joan,
    I have just read your very sad news. Like many on here I also have been through the same thing. By being there for your friend you are doing the greatest thing for her. I have a magnet on my fridge that says "Friends are the family we would choose ourselves"- how true that is and I'm sure your friend feels that way about you.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you both,
    God bless
    Kate x
  • Wonkylegs
    Wonkylegs NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 3,504
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    HI Joan,
    sorry I only just saw this tonight. I don't know what to say, other than to let you know that I am thinking of you both.
    lots of hugs
    Wonky xxxx
  • naseebapnaapna
    naseebapnaapna NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 201
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    hi joan,

    i'm so sorry for you, your friend adn all who know her, that you are all going through this.

    i wish there was soemthing that i could say that may help you all, but just know that she is in my thoughts adn prayers, as are you all.

    thinking of you

    huggles to you

    sangita
  • pluggathome
    pluggathome NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 171
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hi Joan, I am so sorry to hear of this sad news. Thinking of you both. Pluggxx
  • ninakang
    ninakang NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 1,367
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    I'm so sorry to read this, Joan. I've sent you a PM.

    Nina XXXXX
  • jean123
    jean123 NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 642
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Sorry to hear your very sad news Joan,

    From Jean and the forum team.
  • angel1
    angel1 Bots Posts: 1,464
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    So sorry that I haven`t been able to reply before now Joan. Family stuff.

    I was very upset to hear of your friends diagnosis, and the distress this will inevitably cause her - and you. Whilst I am unbelievably sad for her, I have to say that, at the moment, my main worry is for you. I have always felt, whenever you have spoken about her, that you saw her as a Mother figure, as well as a friend. Having been through that loss already with your own Mum, this will be doubly hard, bringing back memories. I wish you the strength to get through.

    My own experience of people of this age is that, naturally death is something they have given thought to. I have found that they are very much appreciative of someone who will allow them to share those thoughts - not easy when you love that person - without shutting them down, and I suspect your friend will want you as that person Joan. I feel you will be more than capable of coping , but may need to hold back a little of yourself , for yourself, to be able to function completely, with the rest of your own life.


    I wish you lots of love and luck..........Ange.
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson NonActiveMember5yrs Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    angel1 wrote:
    So sorry that I haven`t been able to reply before now Joan. Family stuff.

    I was very upset to hear of your friends diagnosis, and the distress this will inevitably cause her - and you. Whilst I am unbelievably sad for her, I have to say that, at the moment, my main worry is for you. I have always felt, whenever you have spoken about her, that you saw her as a Mother figure, as well as a friend. Having been through that loss already with your own Mum, this will be doubly hard, bringing back memories. I wish you the strength to get through.

    My own experience of people of this age is that, naturally death is something they have given thought to. I have found that they are very much appreciative of someone who will allow them to share those thoughts - not easy when you love that person - without shutting them down, and I suspect your friend will want you as that person Joan. I feel you will be more than capable of coping , but may need to hold back a little of yourself , for yourself, to be able to function completely, with the rest of your own life.


    I wish you lots of love and luck..........Ange.

    I would like to thank everyone who has sent me a message of support on this thread. It is very much appreciated.

    Thank you, Ange, for your kind thoughts. As my friend is 20 years older than me, I suppose she is something of a mother figure to me, as well as my friend. But whereas with my own mother there were some things I would not have discussed, with my friend I can tell her absolutely anything. I know that she will not judge me, but she will always be very honest and direct. We also share the same sense of humour, and we always find a lot to laugh about.

    It is typical of her that she has decided to speak openly about her cancer if anyone asks how she is, and she inspires me with her courage.
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