It’s Not Just the Pain… The Mental Fights Are Even Harder

VeloraX
VeloraX Member Posts: 1
edited 7:20AM in Living with arthritis

Hello guys,

New member here, but just another one sharing pain.
So here is my story, I was diagnosed with RA at an early age, and it’s been a daily struggle ever since. Most days I start out trying to keep up, but by night I feel completely drained and end up being hard on myself for not meeting my own expectations.

I know it might sound a bit heavy, but this has been my reality so far. I’ve heard all sorts of advice — pray more, change diet, exercise — and while I know those can help, it’s really tough to balance the constant mental battles along with the physical pain.

I’d really love to hear your stories and be a part of this community.

Thanks for reading.

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Comments

  • chrisb
    chrisb Moderator Posts: 813

    Hi @VeloraX,

    Welcome to the versus arthritis forum.

    I hope you find joining the forum really useful in helping you manage your own situation.

    No doubt you'll have already visited our website but here's a link to a relevant section that may be helpful:

    https://www.versusarthritis.org/about-arthritis/conditions/rheumatoid-arthritis/

    Do join in with any existing chats or indeed start you own if you wish.

    Best wishes

    ChrisB (Moderator)

    Need more help - call our Helpline on 0800 5200 520 Monday to Friday 9am to 6pm

  • Moira
    Moira Member Posts: 129

    I know what you mean, although I have different arthritic problems. It is so difficult when you want to do things but can't.As to the pain!! And I don't want to have a dependence on heavy pain-killers either.

    My Rhumatologist prescribed a mild anti-depressent to use at night to help me with a decent night's sleep. I don't know if something like that would help.

    I also have started a CBT diarry. Each day I write how I feel (red writing for the ugh times and blue when I feel a bit better.) I then set myself 2 or 3 very basic goals for the next day e.g. Go to church/do your welsh study/do 10 mins in the garden/dust the living room/sort out the downstairs bookshelves….. just very small goals.

    I then tick them off the next day. It does make you feel as if you have achieved something. It I haven't I then have a "rest day."

    I have also found Tai Chi helpful - I sit down for that. Also we have a brilliant Elderly Keep Fit and the tutor will give you a alternative exercisesif you can't do one of the simple ones. We have a really good laugh, as most of us have disabilies of one sort or another.

    I am also learning another language which takes my mind off things (Duo LIngo is good)

    Don't know if that helps. Good luck.

    Moira

  • Naomi33
    Naomi33 Moderator Posts: 599

    Morning @VeloraX sorry to hear your concerns.

    My advice keep talking to people, join groups, RA groups, walking groups if possible mix with people with similar or same conditions. Their knowledge and experience helped me through the deep dark days.

    Obviously keep posting too and connect with others online if unable to meet people.

    Best wishes @Naomi33

    Need more help? - call our Helpline on 0800 5200 520 Monday to Friday 9am to 6pm


  • Baloo
    Baloo Member Posts: 549
    edited 31. Aug 2025, 22:24

    @VeloraX

    What I would suggest is a closer look at your activity list, which ones are the easy ones, the ones that you can get the most thrill out of completing, as they are bound to get you active and make you feel better.

    I mark mine up with emojis for the easy ones 🟡 and the hard ones 🔴

    Save the hard ones for when you can slack off, and can put up becoming more thoughtful, inactive and stiff.

    Pick the easy ones that you identified earlier, and they don't even need thinking about what they are, you just do them.

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