at puter at 01.51, ha, the puter clocks an hour out

24

Comments

  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 30,384
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    See you there airwave :)

    Did they accuse you of 'leering'?

    how very dare they?

    n020.gif

    just over a few uniforms.....

    indeed.....and Iris :D

    It would be a pleasure to welcome you to our ward... :wink:
  • janie68
    janie68 Member Posts: 1,186
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    The uniform is polo tops & trousers, sorry boys!!!!!!

    We have only 6 beds so only need one consultant but we do need a registrar....

    Any offers? List yr qualities and qualifications to apply

    Janie
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Perhaps I could look after the staff hospitality suite, I could be head barman, I'll check the pipes regularly making sure theres no stale beer and the whisky, can't have whisky going off. Might need the help of a nurse in the cellar..... to check the pipes. Then theres the staff canteen, who's going to run that? Christmas parties and staff outings to organize, where shall we go?

    8) Its a grin, honest!
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    OMG. Quatermass (sp) or what? DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Right Janie I's here for the night shift and lie the uniforms as well :D x

    Airwave my fried just make sure you have a high comfy chair and an endless supply of tetley and I is happy........ Hey really nice to see your grin back here ad hope you don't need to be a patient on the ward here cus my nursing skills are more veterinary than human :wink: Cris x
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 30,384
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Ok

    Nightshift over, but still no victims - er sorry PATIENTS.

    Glad to see the pipes are cleaned properly and that everone had been de-flead (Cris?)

    Uniforms are looking GOOD :D

    Why are they all two sizes smaller that we are though....
  • janie68
    janie68 Member Posts: 1,186
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Half the staff haven't checked for their shift yet. No ops until at leastthe consultant is here. First patient will be Iris on Monday morning. Iris you need to sign consent forms pls.

    The uniform are always 2 sizes too small I'm afraid.

    Where's my tea and biccies pls?

    Janie
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Things will take a day or three to get up to speed, I've ordered the beer and whisky, oh and some glasses, didn't bother with half pint ones. I took a executive decision and went with the roasted peanuts and pork scratchings for nibbles.

    The first staff outing will be to...............(roll of drums).....the Highlands, some good distilleries up there. A call to the osteopaths and physio on the way back, past the chemist, should suit us?

    8) Its a grin, honest (hic)!

    psssst! Can I take these pills with alcohol? or should I just not take them :lol:
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Damn, I've just bought a lovely stapler for the same purpose. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Janie....... what do you mean 2 sizes to small....... :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :lol::lol::lol::lol:

    Hey since we are not busy I can do a second shift........ x
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    On a more serious note, can we get a contract from the NHS for the supply of patients to the teaching hospitals???? The new doctors will have to learn somehow, it could keep us supplied in T and biccies.

    To dunk or not to dunk, that is the question.

    8) Its a grin, honest!
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Did you know you can viagra as a powder/sweetener now? It does nothing for your sex life but it stops your biscuits going limp! Boom-boom! DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    dreamdaisy wrote:
    Did you know you can viagra as a powder/sweetener now? It does nothing for your sex life but it stops your biscuits going limp! Boom-boom! DD


    I was getting fed up chasing soggy ginger nuts round my cuppa, now I know! Would it stop Jack Hobs breaking as you take a bite?

    8) Its a grin, honest!
  • dorcas
    dorcas Member Posts: 3,516
    edited 5. Jun 2010, 07:47
    janie68 wrote:
    Half the staff haven't checked for their shift yet. No ops until at leastthe consultant is here. First patient will be Iris on Monday morning. Iris you need to sign consent forms pls.

    The uniform are always 2 sizes too small I'm afraid.

    Where's my tea and biccies pls?

    Janie

    :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

    I'm really not to sure about you lot and your rather 'gung ho' approach to surgery......that airwave is a bit worrying to with his penchant for stockings and viagra!!!...are you sure he's qualified?

    ...and your anaesthetist is maybe a little behind the times?....cave man approach or what!!

    what about them nurses? 'june bursting out all over' is not what I expected to see first after the op....

    ...but , after careful consideration, if you promise to take my picture (airbrushed of course to get rid of the 'laughter' lines) and have it posted on the front of your new glossy hospital brochure I'll think about going ahead.

    btw who's the surgeon ? do I get a private room with all mod cons?
    am I getting danger money!!!!!
    Iris x :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
  • dorcas
    dorcas Member Posts: 3,516
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Just in case no-one has clocked what my op is for...I am NOT having an amputation!!! so get that (t)rusty saw put away delboy! meccanno...well that might just do the trick!

    ....ahem...where are all the other pre-op patients? I can't see anyone in recovery either..... why have you got that humungous bin outside theatre?

    Irisx
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 5. Jun 2010, 08:06
    That's our bits and spare parts box. What we lop off one we attach to another. They're coming to take me away, ha-ha, they're coming to take me away, ha-ha, ho-ho, hee-hee. . . . . . . . a010.gif DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Iris...... between Dels anesthetic, Airwaves maccanno and my veterinary nursing you will be fine :lol::lol::lol::lol: Janie will keep us in some kind of shape so we get NHS funding :wink:

    The real question you should be asking..... why are the dogs look overweight :lol::lol::lol::lol: (sorry been watching Horrible Histories :lol::lol::lol: )

    If nothing else we can make other hospitals look good :lol::lol::lol::lol: You do have a nice private room and an endless supply of grass :wink: xx
  • janie68
    janie68 Member Posts: 1,186
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Where are the late staff?

    We is learning CPR this afternoon just in case for Iris on Monday.

    Janie
  • dorcas
    dorcas Member Posts: 3,516
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Just what is the name of this so called hospital :shock:

    'Hammer House of Horrors'.....'Hell's Kitchen'.....'One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest' ......' The 'X' Files'....or 'The Twilight Zone' :?:

    A is in need of some reassurance ......am I 'gettin' or 'givin' when I'm in this 'theatre'......and I really don't like the way them dogs are lickin' round my feet. :shock: :!:

    Iris x :lol::lol::lol:
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Arthers Care Zone???? Arthers Coronary Care??? Arthers Caring Hospital???? Arthers District Hosp.???? Arthers Forum for Sick People???? The Virtual Arthers Care Centre???? The Arthers Virtual Hospice???? The On-Line Care Hosp. uurrrrr I dunno....help!



    8) Its a grin, honest!
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    M.A.S.H. Mells Astonishing Shed Hospital. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • sharmaine
    sharmaine Member Posts: 1,638
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hi Airwave
    I didn't quite understand what 'puter' was and had to read your post! I hope you're feeling rested today. You're so right about the lack of empathy in some people. My sister-in-law is like that - she asks how I am but I get the feeling she doesn't give a damn. She's always miserable and moaning about something or the other. I would like her to have a taste of arthritis for a week or two and then she would have something to moan about.

    Rhubarb jam - is it homemade? I have a glut of rhurbarb in the garden and was going to look out for some recipes or a way of preserving it.

    I've just been outside counting the baby apples on my trees. I should have just over 100 in October. As they're not cooking apples I thought I might dry some and have apple rings.

    I hope you're enjoying this weather. I'm melting.

    Sharmaine
    X


    PS Will the tea be hot in our arthritic hospital? It was rubbish when I had my TKR - I hate cold tea. And can I put my order in for a cream tea now? :lol::lol:
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Sharmaine,
    Have no doubt this is the best hospital ever, you always come out cured (ish)!

    The rhubarb jam was a shop brought one, the recipe is in the Microwave Jam Book, available on the web, the things I know!

    Anyrate enough of this puter, I haven't done anything today, I have a Moroccan Chicken c/o Delia to prepare for tonight, it takes two hours to cook it.

    8) Its a grin, honest!
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hey Airwave could I book in for my neck please? I need a RSJ in it and maccarno will work....... :lol::lol::lol:

    Janie has practiced the CPR ( Janie I used to hate doing that :wink: ) so I should be ok for the anesthetic and anyway Dels way would so much easier to recover from but Jaine can we also have a course on head injuries :lol::lol::lol::lol:

    Right I had best get this bowl of neeps, carrots and apples in for Iris and drag the dogs off her :lol::lol::lol: Cris x
  • janie68
    janie68 Member Posts: 1,186
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    A course on head injuries... Me thinks just knock 'em out and when they come round they'll be fine???

    M.A.S.H is our name. We shall have opening ceremony tomorrow with the new anaesthtics (sp) purely for testing purposes and tea oh and cake.

    Janie

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