Hi, Welcome!

The community is a safe space for people living with and connected to arthritis to ask questions and share experiences. Get started by registering here and posting your first comment or question!

Sign In with a Versus Arthritis account

Re:Val a true friend.

mellman01mellman01 Posts: 5,303
edited 15. Jan 2014, 11:56 in Community Chit-chat archive
Hi, this is the most difficult thing I've had to write in my life, and I hope her family will understand me posting this today.
I received a call this morning from Val's husband Steve informing me his dear wife and our friend Val died in the early hours of this morning after a very long, and immensely brave battle against cancer.
I will always remember the first came on here, she took me under her wing and gave me very sage advice and guidance through those early days which was so good of her, but that was our Val all over, she always saw the good in people and was never judgmental of anyone ever.
She was also a truly decent and immensely caring human being who was incredibly strong and stoic throughout her illness, she never once complained which made it all the more incredible, I must say it also made me feel very humble and honoured that she thought enough of me to considered me to be her friend.



  • barbara12barbara12 Posts: 20,814
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thanks Mell
    How sad...bless her.. like you say she never complained and was always here for everyone.. she also with Trish took me under her wing when I first joined the forum...she would advise me were to post things...and she was a real friend...always there when needed....RIP my dear friend...Mell she would have like this....it came from the heart...xx
  • migmig Posts: 7,142
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Goodbye to a very brave lady and a true friend of the forum. Mig
  • frogmortonfrogmorton Posts: 25,821 ✭✭✭
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00

    I am devastated. You have said it all and I can add nothing.

    She was a fabulous lady (a lady she was even if she said she wasn't ;) ), who continued to give support to us lot on here even when she was clearly suffering herself.

    It's my job now to 'keep an eye' on you Mell - I promised her I would.

    To Val's beloved husband and boys - she adored you all and my thoughts are with you.

    Valval RIP


    Toni xxx

    Toni xxx
  • tjt6768tjt6768 Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    To Val's family all I can say is thank you for letting get to know such a beautiful person.

    She will be deeply missed on here..

    Goodnight and Godbless my dear Val.
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • dreamdaisydreamdaisy Posts: 31,567 ✭✭✭
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    This is devastating news. Oh Mell, this must have been so difficult for you to post - I am truly sorry to read this. I have lit a candle for her and it will burn throughout the night. I 'met' her only on here but she was so lovely, truly kind and gentle with a very good sense of humour. My thoughts are very much with Steve and her boys; as Frog said she adored them and, of course, they her.

    The struggle is done. I sincerely hope you are at peace. DD x
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • appleroseapplerose Posts: 3,621
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Very very sad news. You were always helpful to everyone and never complained even though you had a hard fight on your hands Val. Sleep tight. My thoughts go out to her husband and her boys. X
  • moderatormoderator Posts: 4,082 mod
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    We too will miss Valval and the love and humour she brought to the forum, Val was there for all of us, the cafe is a shining example of how she thought of us

    Love to all her family and to all her friends on the forum

    From the Mod team and Webmanager.

  • hileena111hileena111 Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I was devastated when I heard the news at first.
    This must have been so hard to write Mel.
    All Vals family......you are in my prayers

  • tkachevtkachev Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I read the other thread early this morning. Even then I thought she was responding to the treatment so was very shocked to hear she had passed away.

    My thoughts are with her husband and her 2 boys.

    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • julie47julie47 Posts: 6,142
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I haven't been on here for a long while but I have heard this sad sad news. I just wanted to say to vals family that I am truly sorry for their loss.
    God Bless you Val

    Love Julie xx
  • TurbogranTurbogran Posts: 1,933
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    oh how sad Mel
    R.I.P Val MY thoughts and prayers go out to her family
    Take care
    Carol xx
  • NumptydumptyNumptydumpty Posts: 6,494
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Mell, thank you for having the courage to pass on this very sad news.
    Val will be greatly missed by many, her strength and courage admired.
    My thoughts are with her family.
    RIP Valval, a truly lovely lady.
  • coco67coco67 Posts: 2,441
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    RIP Val, thought with her family at this sad time x
  • villiervillier Posts: 4,426
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thank you mell it must have been so hard for you to post this, I didn't really know valval as I have only been on here for a year but the posts I have read and the support she gave was second to none and what a truly remarkable lady she was. My sympathies to all her family RIP lovely lady.....................Marie xx
    Smile a while and while you smile
    smile another smile and soon there
    will be miles and miles of smiles
    just because you smiled I wish your
    day is full of Smiles
  • elnafinnelnafinn Posts: 8,043
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Val was a forum angel for a long time, always there to welcome newcomers and offer advice and comfort. Her wise counsel and gentle kindness will be missed by all who knew her.

    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • jillyb1jillyb1 Posts: 1,725
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    R I P Val , you will be sorely missed by your forum friends but your love and kindness will live on in your boys .
  • stickywicketstickywicket Posts: 25,977 ✭✭✭
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Val is a great loss to the forum. She was always one of the first to jump in with a kind word of support and encouragement. She knew the value of laughter too. I shall miss her.

    Thank you, mell, for what must have been a very difficult thread to initiate.
    “There is always a well-known solution to every human problem - neat, plausible, and wrong.” H.L. Mencken
  • bubbadogbubbadog Posts: 5,852
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I was told that Val had lost her battle with Cancer last night by text and it really shocked and upset me as I thought she had being doing well over Christmas. I have to admit I've shed quite a few tears since I heard the news, even though I had never met Val she has always been a friend to me since I came on to Arthritis Care Forum. As others had said she took me under her wing. Even when she was poorly she always left messages and and responded to peoples topics. She was Arthritis Care everyone knew her and loved her. She will leave a huge hole in all our hearts. I want to pass on my sincere condolences to her husband and Children. Heaven has a new angel.
  • rondettorondetto Posts: 2,411
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    My condolences, I've spoken to often on here and she was a very kind and polite person. She will be truly missed.
  • dachshunddachshund Posts: 7,710
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Val will be missed
    val welcomed me when I came on the forum she was always so kind and help full.
    I want to pass on my condolences to her husband and children.
    joan xx
    take care
    joan xx
  • jillyb1jillyb1 Posts: 1,725
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Just remembered a quotation from ( I believe ) Pericles : What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments , but what is woven into the lives of others .
  • mike26mike26 Posts: 416
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    very sorry to hear this and my condolences to her
    family .will be sadly missed.
    RIP val.
  • CompositorCompositor Posts: 122
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Sorry, I posted some comments in Chit Chat

    My sincere condolences to Val's family, I was truly sorry to hear of her loss, she had contributed so much in humour, support and love to all for so long, we will miss her.

    R.I.P. Val...love to Steve and family.

    John x
  • dreamdaisydreamdaisy Posts: 31,567 ✭✭✭
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    These are my words of comfort (they are from The Prophet by Khalil Gibran); the deeper sorrow carves into your being the more joy you can contain. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • dorcasdorcas Posts: 3,538
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I was so so sorry to hear that our beloved Val had passed... what a truly lovely lady she was and what a kind and lasting legacy of support and love she has left behind.

    To Steve and family..

    Wishing you peace to bring comfort, courage to face the days ahead and loving memories to forever hold in your hearts.

    Iris x
Sign In or Register to comment.