motability car rules.

applerose

Hope you are ok Elizabeth and managing to sort things out. x

barbara12

Sorry Im late Elizabeth but I have been on hol for a few days I did ask about you in the cafe because I was really worried, I still hope this can be sorted between you both, but I can imagine how you are feeling now, he cant take back what he has said..its so sad it has come to this silly man.(((()))) xx

tkachev

Yes things are better, at least he has acknowledge that I am not prepared to give in any more and I think that has made a difference, not just because of the car but also the continuous lack of support. He does own the house DD, although I paid for the extension to be built and doubled the size of the house and he probably does see the car as his.

I have set a precedence in the past by giving-in, mostly because I was unclear on the motability rules but over time have come to understand them more.

There is an element of him wanting to please his Dad, a much bigger bully than my partner could ever be but always at my expense, such as leaving me alone at home with the children when very ill to fulfill their needs. Also because they never offer me any help with the children, and all the time in the world to OH's Sister, I am quite resentful, so try to keep away from them as much as I possibly can, and risking my much-needed car is a bit of a smack in the face for me.

Now I am hoping OH will answer them correctly in the future, that the car cannot be used in such a way and perhaps they need to stop asking! May be they will feel a little bit guilty that we now have to use our capital to purchase another car, something my partner will find difficult as he has few savings. He will have the larger share of usage of the car too, even if we went halves on the cost.

As you say Barbara he cannot take back what he has said and he's been well out of order in my opinion, but I think he is a little bit sorry.

Thank you everybody for your very wise words.

Elizabeth xxx

barbara12

Elizabeth I am so pleased to read that...at least you are getting somewhere slow but sure, maybe this was the awakening he needed..I hope you can both carry on talking and let him know how hurtful all this has been, you do a brilliant job with the children even though you are suffering..and hopefully he will see things different...then again who knows :roll: ...thinking of you...xx

tjt6768

Hi Elizabeth.
Progress is progress I suppose.
I just hope that he starts to value you for being you and not the means to a new car every three years.
I apologise if I was out of line with my comments before but I believe that you can and could do better.

Xx
YBH'S
xx

stickywicket

Well done, Elizabeth, on tackling a difficult situation head on. You have stood firm and that cannot have been easy. Don't waver in the future. I very much hope the improvement is permanent

applerose

Glad to hear you are sticking to your guns Elizabeth. I hope things keep improving and your OH will defend you now to his family. xx

dreamdaisy

Re-discover that core of inner strength which I know you have and start standing firm against him. He sounds over-bearing, selfish and controlling, possibly all camouflaging a weak character. DD