DD's Miraculous Tripe Therapy

daffy2

Would codswallop be a suitable alternative for those whose religious or ethical situation precludes the bovine version?

stickywicket

Crikey, daffy! With suggestions like that it might be necessary to co-opt you onto the board of directors

stickywicket

Barbara – is it a scam I am saddened that you could think so badly of us. The price list will shortly be plucked out of the air.

(DD – mig likes cruises. Cruises tend to attract golden oldies with arthritis. Maybe she could be the cruise equivalent of the Avon Lady ie the Tripe Lady. What do you think?)

dreamdaisy wrote:

Barbara honey, would we scam you? :? Of course we wouldn't, this is all artisan, free-trade and organic tripe of the highest quality. DD

PS. Sticky? Are we gonna scam the lovely B?

DD – probably.

Tezz – you're up for Board membership too. As for the tripe vinegar – this could have legs.

Daffy – side-effects :shock: Wash your mouth out. Our super organic artisan tripe is completely free from side-effects. If you get them it must be something else that caused them. (I forgive you for the 'tripe hype' though.)

Anna – you're so far ahead of us I'm tempted to feel you should be in charge of the entire venture and not just in Canada.

LV – if you can manage to pronounce it we can concoct it.

Phee – Prices will be on a sliding scale as befits the product. BOGOFFS will be available as soon as we recover the rejects from the waste bin. Side effects are not an option.

Boomer13

No scammers here, fully guaranteed to cure. No triperbole.

mig

On the ethnic front you can get tripe from sheep and pigs as well but they are only for those with an acquired taste.
I have spent a large part of the afternoon researching tripe on the inter web :roll: did nod off.
"tripe is rich in nutrients such as the b vitamins and co-enzyme q10,1 portion per day would give you 100%of your daily iron & zinc" and apparently is good for the male reproduction system but too much is bad for cholesterol levels ,what a load of tripe.
So its a question of you pays your money you takes your choice.
So here i sit with a tripe smoothy perusing cruise brochures.Mig

barbara12

"tripe is rich in nutrients such as the b vitamins and co-enzyme q10,1 portion per day would give you 100%of your daily iron & zinc" and apparently is good for the male reproduction system
Mig you would say this being on the payroll... :shock:

Starburst

Ladies and gents, you are making this far too complicated. The only real cure for arthritis is to smack yourself around the head with a frying pan. If that doesn't distract you from joint pain, nothing will!

phoenixoxo

stickywicket wrote:

Phee – Prices will be on a sliding scale as befits the product. BOGOFFS will be available as soon as we recover the rejects from the waste bin. Side effects are not an option.

Bargain bucket tripe meds – sounds ideal!

As for side effects, I'm secretly hoping for a boost in my iron levels, now I've read mig's post – though Sophie's frying pan has its attractions too!

stickywicket

mig wrote:

"tripe is rich in nutrients such as the b vitamins and co-enzyme q10,1 portion per day would give you 100%of your daily iron & zinc" and apparently is good for the male reproduction system

:shock: mig, lie down in a darkened room and don't go near the internet. You're starting to believe our triperbole (Thanks Boomer )

daffy2

Memo to the Board: The lab reports on the use of twaddle to develop a vegan version of the therapy suggest this may take longer than first hoped to bring to market.

stickywicket

Daffy, I can report conclusively that your nasty fall has not affected your sense of humour or ability with words in the slightest. Thank you

villier

Love it and it 'aint a load of old 'tripe' xxx

GraceB

I have to say that this all sounds truly like a traditional medicinal resolution. Awful! :roll:

However, it is usually known that things that are good for you don't taste very good and as it is being promoted by DD and Sticky I concede to their far superior knowledge and would like to place an order. However, I will be requesting this in a tablet form please if I may?

GraceB

dreamdaisy

They're on their way to you, the dose is three hundred tablets daily, they are the size of side-plates and must not be broken before consumption. We've sent enough for two days - you should be sorted by then. DD

LignumVitae

After being informed by my sister in law that my daily choices and diet are responsible for my chronic inflammation :roll: I was wondering if there was a triple tripe therapy gift pack for the uninitiated? I was hoping for lots of topical triple tripe therapy or maybe even a soothing bath soak as part of it? All contained in a lovely basket made of dried tripe? Seriously though, the comment immediately made me think of tripe and giggle so thank you DD, Sticky and international agent Boomer, I can happily provide a testimonial quote for your website:

"Triple tripe therapy got me through some bad times, put a smile on my face and laughter back in the mix'

This should help your marketing drive.

Slosh

LV, could this be the perfect Christmas present for your sister-in-law?

mig

Better take on more workers for christmas my sister in law could do with a gift pack,know-all that she is .Mig

Situations vacant,Tripe packers wanted .Wage minimum plus all the tripe you can eat.

stickywicket

Thanks to all your wonderful Tripe suggestions. (DD and mig, what can I say? Clearly your suggestions are superb examples of Super Tripe brain power.) You're now all on the board.

LV, inspired by your lovely sil we are proud to announce the Tripe Christmas Gift Range, 'Say It With Tripe'. Are you too shy to tell that relative who knows exactly how to cure you just how much you appreciate their input? Why not let our extra-matured Ripe Tripe say it for you.

Ripe Tripe comes in:
(a) The Super Deluxe Exotic Ripe Tripe Hamper containing Tripe and Mango Chutney, Tripe Truffles, Tripey Chocs, Minced Tripe Pies, Tripe Tea Bags and, of course, Tripe Stuffing for your Christmas Dinner.

(b) Luxury tripe-infused bedlinen. Sleep will never be the same again.

(c) Our winemaking, in our Grimsby vineyard, is still in its infancy be we can already offer a superb Pinot Tripio, a delectable Tripanillo and, for all bubbly lovers, a truly astonishing Veuve Tripot.

dreamdaisy

Mig! :shock: Minimum wage? Hon, we're all about the profit, don't forget that. Why eat tripe when you can read it?

Right, Christmas is approaching and I have been giving some thought about crackers. Not the ones you eat, the ones you pull. I mean the paper ones that sometimes go BANG! Obviously they will be covered in some of LV's dried tripe, we have tripe-spun hats in various shades of off-white, and a large selection of cheap, cheerful and nearly always useless gifts such as tablets of sulph, meth, lef and cyclo, plus the odd syringe of meth and the anti TNF of your choice (if you buy the right crackers). What we are lacking is mottoes, you know, those little 'jokes' which aren't funny but one feels obliged to laugh.

I'll kick off with 'If at first you don't succeed, tripe, tripe and tripe again.' DD

theresak

Make sure you get the patent sorted out, DD - you don't want the Middletons stealing & marketing your ideas.

daffy2

Don't forget to set up a Helpline - suggest we call it the Tripewire.

dreamdaisy

teresak? I rather like the idea of the Middletons taking an interest in our ghastly - sorry, meant to type lovely - product but as they are all revoltingly healthy I reckon they will stick to cup cakes and trivial Pippa's idea of catering advice. Hmmmm, there's a thought, a tripe cup cake. James? I got there first. 8)

Daffy, I think a better name would be TripeTalk.

Right, another motto. How do you get a plump female arthritic into bed? Piece of tripe! DD

stickywicket

Maybe daffy's Tripewire for the Helpline (Are you suggesting we will need one, daffy :shock: The only contra-indications are for those who have had a sense-of-humour bypass) and DD's Tripeline for the forum (where everyone will discuss the miraculous benefits of SuperTripe.)

DD, I loved your cracker mottoes, especially the last one. My very humble effort would bet:
Q: What is the difference between snake oil and tripe?
A: Not a lot

dachshund

Hello DD
thank you i like trip and onions we had it when we were young.
we also had brains i laughed so much my gran send me out of the room.
joan xx

dreamdaisy

I've never eaten tripe, Joan, I wonder if it's a Marmite thing, viz. you either like it or loathe it? I am sorry your gran banished you from the room for laughing, ah me, they were very different days then, yes? How is Sue getting on? Please send her my love and best wishes.

GraceB, I hope you are busy wolfing down your consignment and are already feeling different. 8) I think Sticky's super-duper-de-luxe versions are the perfect Christmas gift for all the well-meaning my-Gran-had-that-and-she-got- better twerps we encounter on a far too regular basis, I've ordered three lots but have obviously not paid 'cos I don't need to. Things would appear to be quiet on the Canadian front so I guess Boomer has received her order, consumed and is mended: now wouldn't that be a turn-up for the books?

The crackers will be sold in boxes of twelve and maybe a Chinese Fortune Cookie element could be introduced too, such as 'The gorilla in your joints will cause pain.' and 'Your spoon drawer is far too often depleted.' Yeah, we know. :roll: DD