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  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi May
    Great to hear from you.......I knew John didn't need to read music but it never occurred to me about the pressure...sorry
    It is going to be daunting for you because he was your carer...cook bottle washer etc :lol: a bit like Peter is for me.
    I'm glad you're searching the net for things {you always do :lol: } If you can do your shopping online......why not????
    Or what about meals being delivered to you that you can microwave.....I know you might not think that's ideal but certainly to get you both over the first hurdle.
    A cleaner??? {either one you pay or poss you could get one on benefit ...if you know what I mean}
    You have to think of all possible things to make life easy for you both....it would be hard if you were in good health but I think most of us can imagine what it would be like trying to look after someone else.
    You take care of yourself.
    How's the family by the way?
    Love
    Hileena
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,715
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    kellerman wrote:
    If you see this pathetic woman standing at the side of the motorway on your way to Scotland please at least offer to buy her a coffee...preferably laced with a drop or two of whisky.

    No chance, May. We'll bundle you into the car and take you with us. And there's always plenty of whisky where we're going :wink:

    Seriously, it will be so tough for both of you that I can't think of any suggestions to improve matters so I just send more of these instead. ((((()))))
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • applerose
    applerose Member Posts: 3,621
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Sorry I can't really offer much help as I've never been in this situation but you seem to be working things out wonderfully well. I'll send you some more (((hugs))). We'll all be here for you if you need us.
    Christine
  • kellerman
    kellerman Member Posts: 741
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Well ....some ideas to think about there. Not too sure about meals on wheels type of thing.
    One hour before I get him so moving anything he can bump into has taken up some of this morning. Then the fun starts.
    We don't get any benifits...not sure if we are entitled to any but I'll certainly look into that.
    Sister will help with housework. Youngest daughter would have been ideal but she has baby and eldest daughter is going on holiday tomorrow booked before her dad was ill.
    I'm really feeling the stress now. I know....stress isn't ideal for me.
    I've been looking into getting grocery shopping delivered. Tesco seems ok.
    Can't get rid of a permanent headache but again this is probably stress although my neck is cracking a treat.
    Right peaceful cuppa and more pain killers with a sandwich
    I'll let you know how its going providing I don't throw the computer at him
    Many many thanks your thoughts are much appreciated. Love May xx
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    We're with you every step of the way, May. He may get on better than anticipated simply because he will be back at home, there's nothing like your own home when the world is agin one. You are both in my thoughts. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi May
    I didn't mean the meals on wheels ...I would hate that as well.....You can get frozen food delivered and you cook it when you feel like it....That was meant just to tide you over. If you can do it online so much the better.
    You sound as if you have a lot organised.
    Your headache is bound to be stress.
    As DD says there is nowhere like home to recover so things might be much better than you imagine.
    I know he's bound to be frustrated at limitations placed on him
    You take care of your self as well

    Love
    Hileena
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    May we are so glad to help in out own little way...you now need a social worker to come round and go through everything with you including benefits and any help required sorry if you have already done this...will be here for you...(((((()))))xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • maria09
    maria09 Member Posts: 1,905
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi May
    I'm in your pocket with everyone else
    I know we are not supposed to advertise but my dad tried Wiltshire farm foods online
    Delivered frozen and can either be microwaved or oven cooked he said mum liked them and it gave him a little more time
    He doesn't use them often but it does help time wise and if you are suffering with your damn it could save you pain wise
    I do know what you will be going through as I've been there with my mum and dad
    I know you might have trouble getting on here
    Just remember we are all here for you good and bad times
    PM me if you like
    ((((( ))))
    Maria
  • Megrose489
    Megrose489 Member Posts: 776
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Just to agree with Maria that those meals you can microwave were a godsend to my sister-in-law when her husband was ill. It just meant that there was something less for her to worry about.

    Lots of good advice already been given, so I'd just like you to know that I'm thinking about you. Look after yourself.

    Meg
  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Thanks Maria
    That's what I was try to think about although couldn't remember the name and it came over to May as meals on wheels

    Love
    Hileena
  • mig
    mig Member Posts: 7,154
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi May,Just sending hugs .(((((())))))Mig
  • phoenixoxo
    phoenixoxo Member Posts: 625
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello again, May,

    Hope you're feeling a bit better after your nice cup of tea, sandwiches, medication... :)

    I'm in your pocket too – and like the others, I recommend Wiltshire Farm Foods. I've used them twice following hospital stays, and I've found the food good and the service excellent. (You can place your order by phone or online.)

    With online supermarket shopping, it was a bit of a bother finding everything for my first order, but most sites save previous orders, so for the next trips it's a lot quicker. You can make a list too, then select whatever you need each time.

    Best wishes,
    Phee
    PsA (psoriatic arthritis) and other things since 1990. Happy to help when I can :-)
  • Susiesoo
    Susiesoo Member Posts: 358
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello May. I do hope all is going as well as it can. I am thinking of you both.

    Susie
  • applerose
    applerose Member Posts: 3,621
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    You sound as if you are very well organised May. Just wanted to say I am thinking of you. Don't worry about keeping us up to date as you will probably be quite busy till things settle down a bit.
    Christine
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello, I hope yesterday went as smoothly as possible, there will be hiccups of course but things will settle, and hopefully John will too now he's in his own surroundings. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,715
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    I'll echo that. I do hope your poor hands are coping with all this, not to mention all the other bits. I'm thinking of you very much.
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • dachshund
    dachshund Member Posts: 8,942
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello May
    I hope everything went well yesterday. try and rest when you can.
    take care
    joan xx
    take care
    joan xx
  • kellerman
    kellerman Member Posts: 741
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Well I'm ever so slightly going mad. He has had every pair of old glasses out to see if he can see better through them...of course he can't.
    He pulled loads of paperwork out which was all neatly put away to look for his bank book which he can't see anyway but it does need to be brought up to date as his private pension goes in there.
    Every time I sit down I'm having to follow him about as we have had a few near misses.
    I'm getting help with shower on a morning and I have an OT coming out tomorrow to see how we are getting on and to see what other help we may need.
    I've had a look at those meals. They all look good enough to eat!!!!!!!
    Its definately an idea and I'm seriously considering it. If I put an order in tomorrow I could have a delivery on Monday which is the day they deliver here. John is asleep at the moment so I've got my feet up with a cup of tea.
    I have a phone no for a social worker......another person to contact.Not sure about benefits yet. I have spoken to the DWP and they are sending out a claim form for AA. Will need help to fill it in...CAB maybe?
    I thank you all for your continued support and hope you are as well as can be. Bless you Mayxx
  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi May
    It's great to hear from you.
    The first few days are bound to be frustrating for both of you.
    The CAB will fill in forms for you and possibly the social worker and OT together will come up with some more ideas
    Take care pet
    Love
    Hileena
  • applerose
    applerose Member Posts: 3,621
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Glad you've managed to sit down with a cuppa May. It must be very frustrating for John and he's bound to try anything to be able to see better. I'm sure he'll settle down soon. Glad you are getting some help. You could order the meals for a while then stop them if you feel you can manage the cooking yourself later. Take care.
    Christine
  • kentishlady
    kentishlady Member Posts: 809
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello May. Am glad to hear that you seem to be managing ok, although I am sure it must be very difficult for you both. Think you will need great patience. Can remember after my Mum had a severe stroke many years ago and had to rely on my Dad (who up until then she had waited on hand and foot). My Dad was not a patient person and found it extremely difficult to cope. Think women may have a little more patience then men.

    Do hope you are managing to rest as much as you are able to. Take care. Beryl. (((()))) xx
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,715
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Oh May, it sounds like an absolute nightmare of frustration for both of you and exhaustion for you. I do hope the OT can help. (((())))
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    I am thinking of you both very much. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,715
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    ((((()))))
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • dachshund
    dachshund Member Posts: 8,942
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello May
    i'm thinking about both of you. you have both been through such a lot.
    take care ((((((((may))))))))
    joan xx
    take care
    joan xx
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