BOOKINGS BEING TAKEN FOR CRUISE NUMBER 3

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  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Perhaps Mel will get fed up with being dastardly and climb back into his little hole.

    Joy, you got the wrong man. Mel is never dastardly, but always kind.
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  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    bobbid wrote:
    To Delboy

    I do not find your comments the least bit amusing, in fact I find them highly offensive - as someone who had 5 family members including 3 small children killed on the Lusitania 95 years ago.

    RMS Lusitania was an ocean liner owned by the Cunard Line and was torpedoed by a German U-boat on 7 May 1915. It sank in eighteen minutes killing 1,198 of the 1,959 people aboard, including many women and children.

    I consider that your attack on the Skylarc constitutes a crime against humanity that is equally as despicable.

    Agents are on their way to arrest you and you will be taken to the Hague for trial. Unfortunately the death penalty is now banned so you will not be hanged by the neck until you are pronounced dead - the penalty you deserve - but will merely rot in jail for the rest of your life.

    BobbiD

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    Thanks Bobbi
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  • moonseed
    moonseed Member Posts: 289
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    joanlawson wrote:
    Good luck on your island. I'm just going to my cabin to have a good cry now :!: I only started this cruise due to popular demand.

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    Joan, with hurt feelings

    Hi Joan,
    Didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I was stowed away on one of the lifeboats, about to be discovered at any time so thought it best that I swim for it.
    Sorry.
    Steph x
  • valval
    valval Member Posts: 14,911
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    moonseed wrote:
    joanlawson wrote:
    Good luck on your island. I'm just going to my cabin to have a good cry now :!: I only started this cruise due to popular demand.

    b008.gif

    Joan, with hurt feelings

    Hi Joan,
    Didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I was stowed away on one of the lifeboats, about to be discovered at any time so thought it best that I swim for it.
    Sorry.
    Steph x

    steph helcoptor coming to pick you up and fetch you back your cabin been here for you all along joan come on we r going swimming before i go to work not letting them put us off looking foward to some sun
    val
  • bobbid
    bobbid Member Posts: 85
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Torpedo attack on Skylark

    TOP SECRET

    Intelligence sources now report that Mossad, the feared Israeli secret service agency, have become involved in this attempted atrocity, as there were several Jewish passengers on board the liner.

    It is alleged that they are planning to eliminate Delboy in his own home by hiding a bomb in his toilet cistern. This will be triggered by a pressure switch when he sits on the seat, thereby administering the ultimate pain in the bum to someone who is arguably the most miserable pain in the bum on this forum.

    BobbiD (Special Correspondent)
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    moonseed wrote:
    joanlawson wrote:
    Good luck on your island. I'm just going to my cabin to have a good cry now :!: I only started this cruise due to popular demand.

    b008.gif

    Joan, with hurt feelings

    Hi Joan,
    Didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I was stowed away on one of the lifeboats, about to be discovered at any time so thought it best that I swim for it.
    Sorry.
    Steph x

    It's OK, Steph. It was more Delboy than you, but I thought you were conspiring together.

    I'm getting far too sensitive in my old age :!: :roll:
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  • bobbid
    bobbid Member Posts: 85
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Delboy

    Something most people learn as children is - "If you don't want to join in the game, that is fine, but then trying to spoil the game for the other children is mean."

    BobbiD
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Back on the Isle of Wight, the sun is shining, all is peaceful, and we have enjoyed our visit to the Needles. Now there is time for a leisurely lunch before we continue on to Osbourne House, once the home of Queen Victoria and Ptince Albert. There we may refect on how theirs was a true story of love, and feel at peace with the world.
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  • snowball
    snowball Member Posts: 3,465
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    :) looking forward to trip to Osbourne house, and when i get back to the ship i'm going to get in my jacuzzi :)
    julie
    ((((hugs)))) n xxxxx to ya all
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    snowball wrote:
    :) looking forward to trip to Osbourne house, and when i get back to the ship i'm going to get in my jacuzzi :)
    julie

    Hi Julie

    The trip will be great, and your jacuzzi will await you on our return.
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  • snowball
    snowball Member Posts: 3,465
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    :) Thankyou Joan hope you're keeping well, wonder whats on tonights agenda :wink:
    ((((hugs)))) n xxxxx to ya all
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    EXTRA!EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT.....

    Ship survives torpedo attack by disgruntled males with chips on shoulder! Brave Commodore gets all hands on deck( except those in sick bay) to steer a course to safety.
    Now I am coming up on deck to get Rehab to explain the off-side rule while others have gone ashore, or for a coffee in the cafe

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • joyful164
    joyful164 Member Posts: 2,401
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hope we can now relax for awhile.
    We are hoping for a time of fun, relaxation, go where our hearts want to go, take our minds off all the horrible things going on, bad weather etc.

    I shall go and paint and relax until everyone comes back from their trip. As I have just had my chiro session, I need to rest for awhile.

    See you later

    Joy
  • snowball
    snowball Member Posts: 3,465
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    :) nice to be back on board ship going to salon to have my nails done then i'm going to take a nap see you all later :)
    Julie xx
    ((((hugs)))) n xxxxx to ya all
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    joanlawson wrote:
    moonseed wrote:
    joanlawson wrote:
    Good luck on your island. I'm just going to my cabin to have a good cry now :!: I only started this cruise due to popular demand.

    b008.gif

    Joan, with hurt feelings

    Hi Joan,
    Didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I was stowed away on one of the lifeboats, about to be discovered at any time so thought it best that I swim for it.
    Sorry.
    Steph x

    It's OK, Steph. It was more Delboy than you, but I thought you were conspiring together.

    I'm getting far too sensitive in my old age :!: :roll:
    Oh Joan....what we do without you....this cruise is the best distraction ever.......and the cafe val......I am coming with you to osborne house...then off to some warm climates...my bikini at the ready :D
    Barbara .
    Love
    Barbara
  • joyful164
    joyful164 Member Posts: 2,401
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    joanlawson wrote:
    Perhaps Mel will get fed up with being dastardly and climb back into his little hole.

    Joy, you got the wrong man. Mel is never dastardly, but always kind.


    Oh Gosh Joan, slip of the tongue. apologies to Mel. I mean Delboy don't I? Or was it a typing error? No, perhaps not M is a long way from the D. Mind you, I do type very very quickly :oops: :oops: :oops:

    Joy
  • joyful164
    joyful164 Member Posts: 2,401
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello Cruise Co-ordinator, captain

    I am happy to offer my services as a teacher of art and announce that there will be a still life drawing and painting session tomorrow morning. That is if anyone is interested. Perhaps you could let me know.

    Joy
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    rehab44 wrote:
    DING DONG! Attention! Attention! This is your Commodore speaking,

    Please book your Breakfast in bed before you leave tonight. Breakfast in bed will be served by the hunk of your choice dressed only in a thong for your pleasure. Extra services above and beyond the serving of breakfast is mandatory and at no extra cost.

    Passengers can also book a rub down by an oily Chippendale at the same time.. this is your Commodore signing off.. "     Ding! Dong

    I do hope sausages were not on the menu.

    Trish
  • mellman01
    mellman01 Member Posts: 5,306
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    What have I done wrong then!!????. :?
  • annie_mial
    annie_mial Member Posts: 5,614
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    mellman01 wrote:
    What have I done wrong then!!????. :?

    Absolutely nothing, Mell.........Joy got you mixed up with Delboy........you OK? There's a bunch of us on this cruise falling apart, including the Captain........

    Annie
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    annie_mial wrote:
    mellman01 wrote:
    What have I done wrong then!!????. :?

    Absolutely nothing, Mell.........Joy got you mixed up with Delboy........you OK? There's a bunch of us on this cruise falling apart, including the Captain........

    Annie
    Think if we put us all together...we would make an whole one :roll:
    Love
    Barbara
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    mellman01 wrote:
    What have I done wrong then!!????. :?

    You have done absolutely nothing wrong, Mel. You wouldn't say boo to a goose, let alone try to destroy the ship :!:

    Did you know that Joy wants you as a life model for her painting :?: What do you say :?: :?:
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  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Joan, The provision of a little excitement for the enjoyment of your passengers seems to have been a little too much for some of them. I only carry practice torpedoes on my submarine, that only provide a pyrotechnic display. However, the war against Arthur is only just beginning, and I would be pleased to accept Delboy as my First Officer on my submarine in that conflict. Welcome aboard Delboy.

    Hi Wulf

    There is only room for one vessel on this thread, but you are welcome to take your submarine elsewhere.
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  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    rehab44 wrote:
    I feel ruffer than a dead dogs bum! I have noticed that while I have been on my death bed that some one has allowed the children to play with some grown up toys, like weapons and submarines.

    Ok! Number One get someone to escort the children back to the creche, they are over tired and the excitement has been to much for them... are we docked yet, I did not feel a bump or hear a crash which is the norm when Fat Kev is at the Helm

    Party night tonight!!!!! Good food.. good wine..good company and the West Midlands Police Band and ensemble to entertain us.


    DING DONG!That was your Commodore speaking.

    Hi Captain

    Sorry that I was disturbing you when you were feeling so rough, but I was all alone in defending the ship. I hope you are feeling a bit better now.

    A party night sounds brilliant, so I will stop crying in my cabin and go and get organised to look even more beautiful than usual :!:

    Number One
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  • joyful164
    joyful164 Member Posts: 2,401
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    We'll be ok with all those lovely police with their trumpets and trombones. They won't let anything nasty happen to us.
    I shall away to get ready.
    Glad you are with us again Capt.
    When your near, never fear.

    Joy
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