Mad Hatter's Arthuristic Club

barbara12

This is the club I have been waiting for.... I have my own little world, but it's okay - they know me here.
Barbara x

mirabella

you and me both Barb,I am non conventional!! I am barking mad!MIRABELLA

NinaKKang

I actually have a t-shirt which I sleep in with the slogan "Mad as a Hatter" on it (my little girl Simie has the same one). Bow to my superiority, people!

I went out last night with the people from work, my mad friend Sarah and "Debs from downstairs" (receptionist in the same building, not her actual name). It's the first time I've been out since last September and boy did we have a good time Totally worth the pains today from wearing too high heels and a completely unsuitable short skirt for the weather (Sarah is from Newcastle so I don't like to look a wimp when I'm with her - she didn't even wear a COAT). We discovered the following things:

- no one at works likes our new Chief and I'm the only one who thinks he's good looking (it's a power thing)

- Debs used to be a glamour model and had a breast enlargement

- Sarah has NOT had a breast enlargement but we generally agreed her boobs were great

- Barry isn't really getting married next week because he's retiring soon and HAS to if he wants his partner to have half his pension. He does actually love her very much

- Danny and Adam can't dance but have a bloody good time trying!

- Firefighters will quite cheerfully dance to "It's Raining Men" but draw the line at wearing their uniforms whilst doing so

- Me and Debs are going to very good friends - I've only talked to her in passing before but she is lovely. Although far too pretty and slim for someone in their 40s who has had children

I'm glad Sarah dragged me out - I very nearly didn't go

Nxx

tjt6768

Nina, you truly are nutty as a topic bar... :shock:

Does your t-shirt have a picture of me on it?? :roll: I am after all the president, maybe you wanna be the first Lady

joanlawson

Hi Barbara, Mirabella, and Nina

Welcome to the club, and here's your hats.



Nina, I assumed that you would be joining this club because I KNOW how nutty you are. That's why we always get on so well :!: Glad to hear that you are feeling better now and enjoying yourself. Love to all the familyxxx

tjt6768

Nina is so nutty I almost had an anaphalactic shock just reading her post :???: :eek: :eek: :???: :???: :shock: :shock:

joanlawson

tjt6768 wrote:

Nina is so nutty I almost had an anaphalactic shock just reading her post :???: :eek: :eek: :???: :???: :shock: :shock:

That's nothing, Tony. If you met her, you wouldn't recover for a week

joanlawson

Said Hamlet to Ophelia,
I'll draw a sketch of thee,
What kind of pencil shall I use?
2B or not 2B?
.....................................................................................
There are holes in the sky
Where the rain gets in
But they're ever so small
That's why the rain is thin.
....................................................................................
I wanted one life
you wanted another
we couldn't have our cake
so we ate each other.
....................................................................................

mummyb

Hi Guys Big thanks for making me laugh, just what I needed. I'm going to enjoy keeping up with all your antics. Not sure I have any funny stories at the mo but as a walking disaster area, I seem to make people laugh a lot. My latest escapade was the other day on trying to get out of a chair at work I got my feet tangled in the legs and fell onto my elbows and knees, not a pretty sight, but the person I was with could do nothing but laugh for the next 10 minutes whilst I just felt a complete prat!!!

Forsooth you mad hatters
very funny you be
please can you make a space for me
to join you as you laugh with glee
I need a good laugh from time to time
I like to read your funny rhymes
so please listen kindly to my plea
and find a mad hat just for me.

Thank you, Brenda xxxx

tjt6768

Brenda, dear Brenda, I'm sure that our Joan
Will soon be along with a hat of your own
Your plea has been noted and poem been read
There is obviously something wrong with your head
So with that in mind, welcome to the club
You'll have your hat as soon as Joan leaves the pub!

lol

joanlawson

Hi Brenda and Tony

I like your poetic endeavours :!: Excellent :!: :!:

Here's your hat, Brenda. Falling out of a chair more than qualifies you for membership of the club :!:



Joan

jillyb1

Many thanks for my membership hat ; just to let you know , I really am quite conventional in my lunacy . The paintings in the purple loo are all old fashioned farmyard and countryside scenes , how normal is that ! Doesn't everyone hang paintings in the loo ? Well , maybe it is a bit unusual ! Jillyb

joanlawson

jillyb1 wrote:

Many thanks for my membership hat ; just to let you know , I really am quite conventional in my lunacy . The paintings in the purple loo are all old fashioned farmyard and countryside scenes , how normal is that ! Doesn't everyone hang paintings in the loo ? Well , maybe it is a bit unusual ! Jillyb

Hi Jilly

My loo is decorated on a nautical theme. There's models of a lighthouse, a beach-hut, and two sailors on the windowsill. On the walls are nautical knots, and a 3D picture of a ship which says ''Welcome on board''. I think all these cruises on here have gone to my head :!: :shock:

joanlawson

Five surgeons are discussing who were the best patients to operate on.

The first surgeon says, 'I like to see Accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.'

The second responds, 'Yeah, but you should try Electricians! Everything inside them is colour-coded.'

The third surgeon says, 'No, I really think Librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order.'

The fourth surgeon chimes in, 'You know I like Construction Workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would.'

But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine, and there are only two moving parts - the mouth and the backside - and they are interchangeable'

valval

my bathroom is yellow and have a picture of family of elephants at the beach using deck chairs mummy daddy sister brother and baby bless also have little fish hooks on shower curtain such a sight

joanlawson

valval wrote:

my bathroom is yellow and have a picture of family of elephants at the beach using deck chairs mummy daddy sister brother and baby bless also have little fish hooks on shower curtain such a sight

This could be a whole new thread, Val :!: What's in your loo/bathroom :?:

joanlawson

Les Dawson in Cissie and Ada

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foInKEjLsM4

Pete and Dud at the art gallery.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9OCS08rabE

NinaKKang

Thanks everyone, I accept the post of first lady with no grace whatsoever Still suffering from Friday night - I am fast approaching the time when I won't be able to wear heels at all but, until then, I am going to wear them as much as I can! The psychological benefits, to me, are more than worth the pain at the moment!

Joan, I'm assuming my girls can join too - especially Simie.

Nxx

PS - I'm not posting a link, but go to youtube.com and key in Tommy Cooper and spoons and jars. Classic comedy sketch

barbara12

Just a snippet of my madness,,,a few years ago now, when I first started texting.....I thought LOL meant lots of love....I am not sure how many bereaved...ill or depressed friends I sent it to......put it this way ...I dont have has many friends now... :roll: :oops:
Barbara x

lupin15

OK here it goes....

Six truths of life.
1. you cannot touch all your teeth with your tongue
2. all retards after reading the first truth, will try it.
3.and discover that the first truth is a lie
4. Your smiling now cos your a retard.



(please none take offence this is a joke).

tjt6768

In this club we have a new first lady
She's like a member of the bunch called bradey
She wears high heels and dances all night
She's not afraid to put up a fight
She's as mad as a donkey on skegness beach
She once ate a spider, a fly and a leach..
So that's our first lady, I'm sure you'll agree
She's perfect for the job so make her some tea!?
:???:

gickygawky

Please may I join the club?

To be considered for membership I have compiled a list of skills taken from my C.V.

These include

1) Powers of observation - Having the ability to be the only person I know (possibly only person ever) to have slipped on a banana peel in traffic in the middle of Covent Garden (don't worry after the hysteria/laughing died down people did help me up)

2) Lack of shame -Taking the mick out of my arthritic body/weird walk last night at a party full of strangers by showing of my special thunderbird impression and robot dance to rapturous applause.

3) Highly developed fine motor skills - Once, just before guests arrived at my house, I managed to superglue my hands together and proceeded to provide the light entertainment for the night as the seriousness of the episode became more apparent, panic set in and the novelty wore off (as did my fingerprints)

4) Ability to make new and interesting friends - This one called his pet the name name as I did.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VF9-sEbqDvU

Arna x

mummyb

Thank you for the lovely hat
It fits me well and I'm liking that
It was kind of you to allow me to join you
You're zany and funny, I'll try to be too
but when I feel down and in need of some cheer
I'll remember that you are all here
all ready and waiting to have some fun
so thank you again for having me here
the next drinks on me .... anyone for a beer!!!

Mad Hatters rule OK

tjt6768

Nice one Mummyb.... That's just the kind of insanity we need.. Lol


Ode to Arna:

Arna, Arna, slipped on a narna..
she fell on her bum and cried gourana (I dunno, maybe she's one of them hari krishna's, besides, it rhymes!! :roll: :shock: )
she does the robot for all to see
She's just as mad as you and me..
with a tube of glue her hands were stuck
but did she care, she dint give a MONKEYS... :roll:

Welcome to the mad house Arna, Joan, another titffer please..

tjt6768

I have a confession folks...
I have an addiction, yes, that's right, I am addicted to insanity, I am a fruit bat junkie... I have been going to IA meetings for a while now, meet my sponsor and dear friend...

Salad Fingers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojoICRzSCOo

And you wonder why I am the way I am :???: :eek: :shock: