Many thanks to...........

dreamdaisy

((((( ))))) ((((( ))))) DD

theresak

Oooh, DD - I had cheddar & Branston with my cheese & biscuits yesterday. We again defied Nellie, & had another G & T, which went down well. I'm not eating much- not hungry, but some things you can't miss.

The fruit desserts here are gorgeous, but I have to be careful, as Sidney is likely to protest. There must be a very good chef here, as the food is tip-top.

I'm waiting for the leg pain to ease a bit, then they will get me into my chair and get my clothes on. There seems to be very little I can do for myself. My parish priest came yesterday for a bit, and one of my friends came late afternoon , by which time I'd fallen asleep, so I rang her later to apologise.

The hospice is an amazing place, but we all know why we are here, and I'm really struggling at the moment - physically and mentally. I'm on so many drugs now I barely know what day of the week it is, and I'm very much afraid of what's to come. I hope no-one minds me putting my true feelings down.In hospital, it's easy to pretend everything will get better, but here is different. The staff are wonderful , caring & gentle - but everything is geared towards end of life.

Enough!! Get up and get on with it girl, instead of sitting being sorry for oneself.

See you later,

Tezz xx

frogmorton

Good morning Tezz

I hope today includes another G&T some squirrels to see and some welcome visitors.

I also hope Nellie and Sidney behave.

For myself I can say talking about how you really feel is just fine. We care about you and how you are feeling and can't support you properly if you do the stiff upper lip thing and cover it up.

Considering you say you don't know which day of the week it is I think you are coming across really well. Your forum voice is most definitely you

Today is a glorious day I hope you can see it form your window, one of the things, amongst many, that hospices get so right!

Take care of yourself.

With love, strength and ((()))

Toni xxx

stickywicket

Now then, Tezz. The sun's - almost - over the yard arm so you know what to ask for Plenty of nourishment in a G & T. Who needs food?

Of course you are afraid 'of what's to come'. We all would be. We all will be eventually. But please let us share your real feelings. We don't want any sanitised version of things. We just want to be with you however we can.

As for your falling asleep for your visitors. When I was in hospital for a week with a broken hip (while they determined whether or not it was bone cancer - it wasn't) and doped up with morphine I once explained to the kind priest who visited me "Sorry I can't open my eyes. If I look at you I think I'll throw up." :oops:

frogmorton

Just popping by......

leaving a large G&T



some energy

and some((()))

Love

Toni xxx

[Deleted User]

Hello Tezz,

What a week you've had, hospital appointment now sorted, extra pain relief sorted, more sleep is essential, a lovely afternoon with Nick, holding it inside to let your lovely g'children see you well.

Amazing, you are a special lady, you will have more days with beautiful memories for you and your family.

Please share with us all you wish too, we are here for that, and share those bits with the nurses too, doing that will give you more smiles

Much love
Yvonne x

theresak

Thank you so much. I'm surrounded by people who all want to make me as comfortable and pain-free as possible - young people mostly, who represent the best the NHS can offer, and are seriously underpaid and in many cases, undervalued. Not that I'm getting on my soap box!! I think they're very special people doing a very difficult job.

I may- or may not -choose to have an alcoholic drink later this afternoon or evening: we'll see. Last week I was ' under the influence ' even without any drinks : my raft of meds appears to grow daily, but each little ' tweak ' is clearly explained so I do understand any changes. I think!

I've met with nothing but patience, so I must do my bit too. I'm having some pain relief through a syringe driver, which is a brilliant contraption - God bless the inventor ', - as well as a bucketload of conventional meds.

No idea at this point when or even if ,I will get home, which is a sobering thought, but I can't dwell on that, just take each day as it comes. It's a glorious morning here- squirrels ' antics so funny, birds happily pecking away at the seeds, a king-size pheasant strutting his stuff, all against the backdrop of deep pink tulips, astromeria in tubs, and maples dotted about all over.

Must go - time for Gardeners ' World to take a break.


Tezz x

stickywicket

You are clearly experiencing the NHS at its best and I'm so pleased as it's no more than you deserve. Please feel free to get on your metaphorical soapbox. (I'm assuming an actual one would be out of the question )

Indeed, God bless the syringe driver inventor. It sounds like a wonderful piece of kit and, as we know, little things make big differences.

I'm pleased you have another lovely day. Maples? Oh yes! We have a gorgeous one and some some startlingly bright, frilly poppies ('Look at me!') 'popped' up yesterday. However, we do have a 'triffid hosta' which keeps trying to smother my white peony. Mr SW has hacked at it once but it grew again overnight It had better behave, or else.

I wish you as good a day as possible.
(((( ))))

mermaid

Tezz that was such a lovely generous post and I am sure the staff looking after you really enjoy having such a thoughtful,appreciative patient. I feel the same way about the NHS staff treating me and feel sad to hear moans from other impatient patients. Your enjoyment of nature, plants and wildlife are inspiring and convey the peace in your soul despite your physical pain. This time of year is magical with leaves so bright green and fresh. I remember being in isolation for weeks high up in a hospital ward and the sunrise and sunset took on a huge significance, I never let them close the blinds- always a sucker for a sunset anyway! I am so glad that you sound more comfortable with the new meds and syringe driver - being away with the fairies sounds not too bad a place to be. However you appear extremely lucid ,philosophical​ and articulate here,hope it doesn't take too much energy from you, but thank you so much for posting, I think of you each day as I wake up.. Hoping today is a calm and beautiful one for you and as pain free as possible. Sending lots more (((( )))) xxxxxx

frogmorton

Good morning Tezz

Yesterday sounded lovely. Squirrels antics to watch etc, but I hope you weren't too disappointed that Gardener's world wasn't on? Chelsea flower show :roll:

Ta boo! At least it's now on for a whole HOUR

Those who do the job of looking after seriously ill people usually are fabulous people I agree. They have to be as you say to do it without the remuneration which we think the job deserves. As for the syringe driver!! Fantastic invention as Ms Wicket states - must have been a woman

I hope you pop in later and leave you a virtual G&T if you fancy it.



it won't make you feel woozy unless you want it to

Take care now we have had rain overnight and the birds are cheeping like mad now.

Love

Toni xxx

dreamdaisy

((((((( ))))))) ((((((( ))))))) DD

stickywicket

And, just in case they weren't enough ((((( )))))

dreamdaisy

Hello Tezz, it's all change here in DD Towers so I won't be about as much as usual but that won't alter the fact that I am thinking of you, Nick and the boys very much. ((((((( ))))))) ((((( )))))
DD

frogmorton

Just popping by Tezz

To send my love some ((()))

The birds are chirping here and squirrels are in the trees I hope you can see and hear some too.

Love

Toni xxx

[Deleted User]

Hi Tezz
I hope the weather is lovely with you, I confess I am enjoying the sun and the birds chattering. Sending you lots of gentle hugs ((((())))) from all the moderators
Best Wishes
Sharon

barbara12

Hello Tezz
We dont mind one bit you telling us how you are feeling ..we are here to help or at least listen..has you have with us..
So glad they are looking after you..the driver are good it means you are in control of some of your meds..you enjoy the garden while this weather is with us..did I hear talk of a G&T... (())xx

stickywicket

((((( )))))

dreamdaisy

Hello my lovely, I am thinking of you and yours. ((((( ))))) ((((( ))))) DD

mermaid

Thinking of you and your lovely family so much Tezz and sending many hugs ((((((( ))))))) xxxxxx

frogmorton

Good morning Tezz

We are all thinking about you here very much.

I am exited because we have a village wedding here tomorrow and the preparations are in full swing. We live bang opposite the church so have the best view

With love and ((()))

Toni xxx

barbara12

Thinking about you Tezz...hope you can get out in the gardens..and the birds are singing away...((())) xx

frogmorton

Sending love and ((())) and hoping you are still making good memories and being with your family cared for by those lovely staff.

Birds singing and squirrels climbing trees within sight.

Toni xxx

[Deleted User]

Dear Tezz,

Hoping you have a lovely Sunday, it's a bit cool up here in N Wales, the sun is peeping between the clouds. A blanket I think for a wheel to your favourite spot, then back indoors for a hot drink to wrap your hands around.

Sending love, thoughts and ((((( )))))

Yvonne

bubbadog

Hope Sunday will be sunny, sending (((()))) to you and your family XOXO

stickywicket

Thinking of you, Tezz, and your lovely family. ((((( )))))